Pat In Australia

I am thinking of leaving it all, I am thinking of leaving it all

2009-08-04T11:11:00.002+10:00

Alright everyone. The day has come. You can be excited again. Wait with bated breath for every hilarious or inspiring post I will create, like you always have. I know it's been hard for these couple of months, but the new blog is here.

You can find it at http://www.anotherpatrickcollins.com/blog

It's still under work, so if you see weird links, or it's down when you check it, don't worry, I'm on top of it.

Thanks for checking.

In the end

2009-06-23T18:26:00.001+10:00

Things didn't pan out and Right Angle Publishing couldn't sponsor my visa.

As this is a blog about my time in Australia and I am no longer in Australia, this blog will officially be retired and kept as a time capsule thingy-ma-bobber.

There will be a new one, which I will link from here, but until then, please visit my new website at http://www.anotherpatrickcollins.com.

I will be moving to NYC on July 12 and am still looking for work.

It's gonna take a lot of love, to get us through the night

2009-05-16T22:43:00.008+10:00

You might notice, Pat In Australia is experiencing a bit of a comeback.

I am attributing this to the fact that I feel like I should be writing more, but don't have much other than my boring life to actually write about.

And before you say "Oh Pat, you should write a book" let's both just take a step back and think about what that books would include. In my head, about the only thing that I could write about is the relationship with my parents, my INCREDIBLY stupid years in college, lots and lots of sex...both good and bad but none of which is going to be terribly interesting and in most cases would be a reason why nearly all of my friends WOULDN'T read this book, and Australia.

I wouldn't want to read that. Would you? Nahhhhhh.

So that's where I'm at, a want to write more, an urge to be more prolific and express some creativity, but without an outlet. What do writers who aren't going to be novelists write about to...you know, write and be creative?

In other news, I had my first Dr. Pepper in 11 months today. Totally great. It's somewhat insane how my body reacts to food I haven't had in a long time. I start salivating excessively and basically become a cross between a little gross redheaded monster and an 11 year old on a sugar rush. But the Dr. Pepper was great, and I don't even really like Dr. Pepper that much. In the case there was also Mountain Dew Code Red...and I almost got one of those too, but you know, two soft drinks in one sitting would make me fat.

Updating the resume has been a trial; everything is in size 10 font. I need to get my machete attack up on this CV and get it back to something legible. Oh and in case you didn't click the link, what's up with machete's and Australians? Yeah, click it sucka.

Went to see The Scare Thursday, and once again, Too Many Creeps (a clubnight) totally failed. First it was Wendy James' horrible DJ set, and now it was by booking the band Madonna. Who sound like the identity crisis of a 15 year old boy. Somewhere between screams and breakdowns, Primus inspired bass solos (with a blind melon tee shirt), and a ska band without horns (but a micro Korg!) lies Madonna. And way too many people like this band. There were at least 5 people REALLY into it at the show. Way. Too. Many.

Anyways, The Scare were terrible, and I thought I gave them a good writeup so I felt extra used. The song on myspace is alright, but not even whiskey could save me after the others. I had to just smoke some meth and then go machete attack some kids down the street. Oh just kidding.

There are two promising parties coming up soon though... A Milli: The Party (of course a Lil Wayne, WEEZY F BABY theme) and Ferris Bueller's Gay Off. That gay night has a good sense of humor. Especially since they throw it at a place called Brown Alley. Ew.

Oh you should check out the latest post (it's pretty old) on Elizabeth Carey Smith's blog. She's the shit. She's married to a boy who's the shit. She used to be the senior designer for BUST. I have a lot of secret admiration for her, it might be creepy of me. But I totally agree with everything she says in the latest post.

http://dangerousgirlinsafetytown.blogspot.com/

I'm off to find some Mountain Dew. And chocolate. Being skinny is for the birds.

p.s. - I've found a new favourite Neil Young song, as the title indicates.

There was nothing in the world, that I ever wanted more, than to never feel the breaking apart

2009-05-15T20:34:00.002+10:00

Something that most people know about me, is I'm extremely emotional when it comes to commercials. Here's the latest tearjerker.

Other than that, I'm watching Law and Order for the first time in months, and I'm so excited it's kind of ridiculous.

Note to invading aliens, avoid this town, like this town avoided us

2009-05-14T14:45:00.003+10:00

So Right Angle gave me an employment contract like the day after my last post. I'm still not too fussed over it. I counteroffered, and they will get back to me soon I'm sure. Then I will have a better idea of what I'm doing with my life...but right now this is what is on the table.

Start website for self promotion.
I'm trying to get together some portfolio so I can start pitching for freelance work in the States. But I need to have it somewhere they can access it, so a website seems prudent. I need a logo, so if any of your graphic designers want to make me a quick logo for the price of a couple of beers, let's do it.

Be in Colorado, Missouri, Utah/Arizona, Illinois, and NY this summer.
Yes yes yes. 6 states. Colorado and Missouri in June, Chicago at the start of July, Utah/Arizona middle July, and NYC till August. I'm really excited for home. Really. And to see lovely faces.

See you then.

Facepaint party.

Jmarms sent me popcorn and customs didn't eat it themselves.

Maybe one day we can go back, when everything is slow

2009-04-30T12:25:00.004+10:00

Woah. Bet you didn't see this update coming! Neither did I really, since I'm just sitting at work waiting for edits to come back so I can...do more work and thought "oh yeah, I need to update that sometime."

So the whole idea was this blog would update people in my life as to new things happening to me. The problem is...new things sorta stopped happening. I know, you don't care, you just want some content. Something to laugh at or oooooh at or aweeee to. Let's start with the last, awe at this. MY FACE.

That's the most up to date picture of me. I was in the office, where we apparently don't have heating. I don't get it, the indoors is as cold as the outdoors? That makes no sense, I thought that is the exact reason why humans developed buildings. If temperature isn't an issue, why don't we just all have a giant piece of wood over our heads to protect from rain? Eff you Melbourne insulation.

I've been working, pretty normal. I have a new contract with Beck's (the beer) and am doing album reviews on minimal and microhouse techno albums. As well as a 5 song mixtape. You can find them at this blog for the UBERSELEKTOR. hahahaha. Yes, I know.

In addition to that work, I'm doing some extra things for Hot Spots and Tourism Victoria. How about that? now I really am a tourist writing the tourism manuals now. Speaking of tourists, check out Penny and I hanging out at ACTION ZONE (CLICK IT). I was totally hanging out with a 7 year old up there.

Okay, I have more pictures on my camera that I haven't transferred yet, so I will put those in ANOTHER new post. Karaoke + other things.

Rightangle is working on getting me a visa, but I'm not really holding my breath anymore. Things looked real good and then I got a little bit of a slap in the face, so I'm not to fussed about it. If I get it, great. I have a job and like living in Australia...hopefully I'll get some great friends and not feel like such an outsider if I have a 4 year work visa. If I don't get it, great. I can come home and move to a place where I know I have friends that I miss dearly. I'm looking at you New York, Chicago, and San Francisco.

And on a final note. See you in June. I'll be home on June 18th at 2:30pm. I expect to eat a lot of BBQ, mexican, steak, and ranch. Not together. Oh and New York and Chicago, see you in July. If you want to hang, let me know.

More to come soon! In the meantime, check what I've been up to AT WORK. It's funnier than this!

And I could dream of things you've never seen, Alli please

2009-03-06T23:35:00.003+11:00

I am in love with this website. No no, not this one, THIS one. One of my friends Tait started or manages it or does something hefty for it. A website for junior creatives trying to make it in the industry? Yes! It really makes me sit in my bed while being completely unproductive and get motivated, if only motivated to put on clothes and maybe think about going outside. Junior is amazing.

After reading this article about Twitter/internet publishing...I have decided that this blog is definitely one of the lame ones that is not entertaining at all. Sorry losers, look like I fooled you! Have fun being bored while reading this! Oh and I might get an iPhone and start Tweeting updates instead!

I ventured out to zone 2 today. I have never been out there before, because I have basically been living the (close to) city life for 7 months straight. I went out to visit my friend Franc and her puppy Rocky, who is a beagle that can jump about 4.5 ft from the ground. It's very cartoon like, and he'll run around in a big circle and run straight for you and try to jump off of you. Jackie Chan style, only a human being instead of a brick wall. Oh and the dog can't flip, he just barrel rolls.

While in zone 2, there was an earthquake. I didn't feel it, but Franc did, so that's how I know.

MAKEOVER MARCH! Most of you know this, but I'm going to go on a shopping spree because I want a makeover. I feel like a slob in the band tees and jeans, that same lame outfit I've been wearing for years, so I'm going to class it up a bit. You just get ready, pretty soon I'm going to be model on lookbook.

There is a gay night in Melbourne called Fabrik and I am DJ'ing the next one. I got the best slot (12 to 1:30) and am going to have to impress. I told everyone I'll be wearing the short shorts, so I guess it won't be too hard! No really, what the fuck am I going to play?

Probably this new Juan Maclean that is like The Human League updated for 2010, this record is off the fucking chain.
Oh and Romeo by Basement Jaxx because I've gotten an unhealthy obsession with it again. I remember I had this and red alert on vinyl back when I was going to be a superstar DJ in high school. So amazing.
Other than that, who knows. Most likely just some of this disco mix that I whipped up. Check it outtttt! (click download unless you want to sign up to soundcloud)

In other music news, The Pains of Being Pure at Heart is what all you assholes should've been freaking out about instead of the Vivian Girls. I am highly disappointed in the latter, but the former makes up for it by being nearly perfect.

I just want Kate Moss to hold me, When I break down on your Ducati

2009-03-01T16:54:00.004+11:00

I haven't talked to my mother or father in quite a while. I need to get back to doing that. It's just so hard when my internet doesn't work because then skype doesn't work then my communications skills decline drastically. But hopefully that will be over, we just signed up for a better internet plan, and I think it will all be good. I might even have fast enough internet to look at porn, the cornerstone of the internet.

Joan got back from Vietnam in one piece and brought me a present (pictures at the end). It's pretty awesome and I like it's little perch over my bed.

Her trip was great and makes me very envious. I need to get my stuff together and get out of Melbourne for a bit. Sydney is the obvious and easy choice, plus I have a place to stay. I think I'll probably get up there in the next month.

My father bought me a camera for christmas, and being the snob that I am, I didn't like it that much. Mainly because if I have a camera that's sorta chunky and doesn't fit in my pocket...I'm not going to use all the time. Therefore...I traded it in and got a smaller one! It's pretty nice, and I'm excited to have a real camera again. Tell me what you want pictures of!

My friend Danae needed help with her art installation so on Friday, Joan and I went around with her to the gallery and hung tongues covered in glitter on a wall in the shape of a xylophone. It was interesting. You can find it on Facebook, I was tagged as a tongue.

I might have some exciting news coming up, but we will all just have to wait to hear back about it. I'm just excited, it might get my hands back into music again.

As I said, I got new bedroom stuff and rearranged things, check it out.

I'm Never In My Waking Life, Dreaming Is My All The Time

2009-02-21T14:47:00.002+11:00

There has been so little going on that I don't even know what to post about!

I have just been existing. Nothing fancy, just going to work and coming home.

Kerensa was an original housemate who's bedroom set I was borrowing and she finally called for it back the other day. I thought it was going to be a really really annoying process to try and find new everything but I randomly met Carla, a friend of my friend Kirsten, and she is moving to Europe for good and had whole bedroom set to give away. How lucky am I? As Penny said when we got an entire corner booth on a Friday night (my birthday) at Double Happiness, "Patrick Collins, you are living a charmed life."

Sorta seems like it at times.

Anyways, the bedroom is awesome. Better than before, and if I could figure out how to flip my fucking webcam (which is installed upside down in my computer, good job Lenovo) I would take a picture. Soon. I even got a new doona, doona cover, and pillows. Yeahhh!

Birthday was good, drinks and dinner with good people, that was about it. But it turned out good. I think for my birthday present to myself (my father bought me shoes! Those Polo shoes I'm obsessed with! YEAH!) I think I'm going to buy something really boring, like a USB flash drive. I really wanted a mimobot because I'm a nerd, or one of these branch ones, but they are too expensive.

I think I'm going to pay the $45 to go see Rival Schools and Saves the Day. I have been wanting to see RS for 8 years. That's worth it I figure. Plus they only have like 1 album (and an EP) so they can't really screw up and play a whole bunch of horrible new stuff or something. Saves the Day on the other hand...

I slept about 3 hours last night because some horrible hippies were staying with us and invited all their friends over, and then proceeded to pull an all night rager outside my window. How considerate. I really don't get people some times and how they can be so disrespectful. I bet my mom would be proud to hear me say that. Everyone else I know is like "Yeah right Pat, you're a giant jerk too, jerkface."

Threethousand is throwing a benefit for the bushfires. Check it.

Last night was Carla's going away drinks, tonight is this private Wrangler party on the rooftop, tomorrow is the benefit. Now if only I had people I like to go with, why don't you all just move down here already?

In other news, I had my first fig. It was alright, but they weren't the best figs, so says my housemate. They were totally awesome though because they came from my fig tree in my back yard. Booyah.

Okay, I'm boring today, and everyday.

I'm going to Sydney soon. For sure.

On The Last Day Of Your Life, Don't Forget To Die

2009-02-08T23:54:00.003+11:00

Just to ease your worried little minds.

This day wasn't as bad as the article makes it seem (headline: Worst Day in History), but it is the end of the world in Australia.

I'm sorta near these fires, in fact my mom and I drove through a couple of these places I think, but obviously, I will be fine.

The north is flooding like crazy, but that's the north, and it's full of people who say 'crikey!' anyways.

I'm safe and it actually rained and was cold enough for a cardigan today!

In other news:

I Don't Want To Wake Up, Knowing I Don't Have A Future

2009-02-07T23:10:00.002+11:00

Let's see.

I saw Buraka Som Sistema, I saw Tim Fite, I saw Daedelus, and I saw Todd Terje.

Laneway festival is a disaster, and Melbourne needs a real city festival. People putting it on were really dumb and decided to put Girl Talk on the 2nd smallest stage and caused a riot. Gooooooood job dickheads.

Work is going really well and they might sponsor me for a Visa. Here we go...

Anyways, that's all I really have to update on. Oh and my list of pet peeves, which I have found out mostly happen in the bathroom. Let's start this.
#1 - WHO THE FUCK DOESN'T DRY THEIR FEET BEFORE LEAVING THE SHOWER. I don't know how many times I have walked into the bathroom and the entire floor is wet because someone just hopped out and thought they would mop the floor with their feet. Leave that to japanese babies.
#2 - HANG UP YOUR TOWEL. I used to flip my lid at Stacey for this. It's so easy to just hang it up and when you leave it in a damp pile in the floor, well that does whole lotta good for no one. The good news is that Stacey changed this habit when she lived with me, so luckily there is hope for the rest of you.
#3 - CLOSE YOUR MOUTH WITH THE TOOTHBRUSH. Really. Try it sometime, you CAN still move the thing across your teeth, promise. Why do I hate it so much? Because there is toothpaste all over every surface near the sink, and on the mirror, and all because you sit there with your mouth hangin' open so you can manuever and get all the angles right. Stop it.

Okay that was probably really boring to read, but I thought it was weird that all those things happen in the bathroom and all of them make me angry angry angrrrry.

Song of the week? The Shout Out Louds - Impossible (Possible Remake by Studio).

I miss not being mis-used, I miss it all, so I guess I lose

2009-01-31T12:18:00.003+11:00

I just watched a little kid run down the stairs at the library, and run right into the glass door. He just said 'owie' and kept running. God kids are awesome. I miss you little niece and nephew.

Let's see...things that have happened...

I put out, the 4th issue I have been a part of with threethousand this week. It was pretty good. In fact Penny said it was the 4th BEST issue we've ever done. Something I think everyone should take a glance at though is these awesome bike helmets. So cool. It has been going really well, and I feel capable and like I'm not fucking it up too much. Yay.

I found a work visa I can get if I want to stay. It's a 4 year work visa for a specific company. I would have to get Rightangle Publishing to sponsor me, but that might not be that hard. I guess it's up to them whether or not I stay at this point. Well I could stay illegaly, but I've already told many of you that I'm coming back in June/July and should probably do that.

Hey! I'm coming back in June! My mom didn't even know this so...I thought I would put it on here. Tenative plans are to visit my Grandma in Missouri, spend some time with my momma, spend some time on Lake Powell with my father, and then be in NYC and Chicago for some amount of time...probably a couple weeks in NYC. If I'm coming back, then I'd jet back here to Oz, but if not...I will probably just settle into NYC. So yeah, look forward to a visit from me if you're in Colorado/NYC/Chicago. But if anyone wants to give me a job from any of those places, that'd be pretty sweet...ya know, if I'm staying. :)

I've been pretty obsessed with this song by Best Friends Forever, and the Wholphin DVDs that my neighbor loaned to me, and the tennis. I just watched a 5.5 HOUR match between Nadal and Verdasco last night. It was EPIC. Oh and this made me laugh so fucking hard.

I'm sort of hating Australia right now. It has been between 107 and 115 degrees for the last 4 days or something. It is insane. I can't handle this weather and it's supposed to happen again mid Feb. Greatttt.

My birthday is coming up, and it's going to be strange. I don't know who all is going to be around (Joan will be in Vietnam) and who all is going to...care really? I don't really mind, I'm not a big birthday person really, but I would like to just go out and get drunk and have a good time...who knows though.

I need a dancing partner. It's ridiculous, no one down here wants to go to the dj nights, the good ones OR the bad (mainstreamy) ones. I'm at a loss of what to do, because going by yourself and trying to dance with someone is...gross. But I need to dance. I neeeeed to.

Okay, there is not much else to this. I am just existing, andit's going well. The new job rules, and I'm just sorta biding my time to see what pans out. Hopefully some DJ gigs...hopefully.

And I have a new mix, but I can't upload it because it takes forever no matter what shitty internet connection I'm on so...I'm sorry.

Music stuff:
Conor got me into this band Souled American from Chicago, it's old but it's really good. I also have been enjoying some new stuff like Fly Girls! the new souljazz release of female MCs, Barzin's new album that's fantastic, M. Ward's newest, Mirah's leaked new record (A)spera, and the new Emmy The Great full length. I have also fallen back into some Silver Jews (so good), The Tallest Man On Earth (how did I miss this?), Jaymay (because I can listen to it without bawling now), and 4 new (to my collection) Kleenex Girl Wonder CDs that I found. I want to make Graham Smith's babies.

I have a lot to say abou the new Animal Collective, but mostly that you all should stop shitting yourselves over it because you look ignorant, like this is the first Animal Collective album you've ever heard.

Jesus get over it.

Love you!

I hate myself when I'm alone, It's just with you I feel okay

2009-01-11T18:06:00.002+11:00

So yeah, Google analytics tells me you people have stopped coming to my blog. What a surprise! Down 7%? Well I guess that isn't bad when time spent publishing content is down about, 80%! Look at me go. I'm a solid investment.

Really things that have changed in my life since last time:
1) Started new job this week.
2) Started writing for the big newspaper down here, The Age.
3) Feeling lonely.

The new job is good. It's a bit stressful, but I guess since I didn't have any stress for the last, oh, 8 months...it's alright. I write a lot more, which will probably drain me of any wit that I normally have, so be warned...the blog is not a place for funny business. For that, you can go to http://www.threethousand.com.au/author/patrick-collins/.
But yeah, the job is good. We had a super stressful week because we lacked some content. We wrapped it up alright, and found a really cool shop with a cool rooftop that said we could use it for...anything. Cool. Rooftop party series here we come.
The worst part was not having all of our content by the deadline...but I guess having a week where a lot of shit went wrong was a good way to gauge what needed to be fixed to get us back on track and what I could do to help that. Which is mainly try to organize shit because we arn't that organized...and kill people when they miss their deadlines. Or at least maim them. I guess maiming would be better, preferably if it wasn't to their hands...so they could still write. But yes, $240/wk + any other work I get...I'm swimming in cash compared to before!

The other week Penny (my editor for those of you new to the story) told me she needed a CD to review because *gasp* she was writing a CD review for The Age instead of her normal art stuff. I gave her the Brian Eno & David Byrne one, I mean, who can't write about those two? She did really good and told me that the paper hadn't gotten all the submissions and that I should write one up. So I did, for Belle & Sebastian's BBC Sessions. Voila, they printed it, asked for another, and so this week I got 'CD of the week' in a half page spread. Looks good. Too bad none of you will see it, unless you ask my parents to have a look at the clippings I'm sending them (I promise, I will!)

Joan has started on her traveling spree...which means in the whole of Australia, there is no one that has known me over 6 months. The people who are closest to me have only known me for about 3. Weird. It makes me realize two things. 1) I don't really feel okay by myself, 2) no matter how many times you tell yourself 'oh friends take time' it is hard to believe. It'll happen, or it won't and I'll move back to the people who really matter. Whatever, it just makes now...sorta lonely.

My feet are like...peeling on the bottoms...near my toes. It's gross. I hope it's not like some zombie virus taking over my body from the lower extremeties up. Probably not.

I spent the day on the beach, reading, and hanging out. It was nice. Now I think I'm going to go out and sit in my hammock and listen to music. Ah the life of an Associate Editor.
Yeah.
Hah.

You Gotta Play Tough My Love

2008-12-27T18:28:00.002+11:00

Christmas is weird when you're across the world.

I mean, obvious stuff like it's hot down here is something I can get my head around. It's hot in the states in certain places too. No biggie.

The thing that really seems to get me is because they don't have any holidays that are massively celebrated at this time of year (like Thanksgiving or Halloween) the Christmas shit has been up for ages. It's like, when we get upset that the Christmas stuff is on the shelves before Halloween...only for months longer.

The biggest thing I missed about Christmas was this. or this. And I guess my family is up there too, but really...I got to talk to all of them so that was fine. I don't have the ability to make the other stuff actually happen, therefore I was very full of...candy and nut mix and whatever else was in the box from my mom. I might have even eaten some saltines. I like those though, so that's actually a plus. SPEAKING OF SALTINES...they come in a sheet here. Like 4 little crackers together rather than individual crackers. I was told it was so you could make a 'cracker sandwich.' Sounds horrible.

I made out like a bandit for Christmas, and just in time. I am proud to say that a large portion of my present went to pay my rent today. Yay! I also found that I may not have to get my shirts and clothes tailored for the rest of my life. Those bastards in L.A. at American Apparel actually make stuff that fits me. Too bad they don't use little children to produce it. Like, really, I love that aspect to my clothes...a little soul goes a long way in terms of my clothing. Oh and AA overcharges for everything, but you know, whatever...it fits. What this means is: TO ALL THAT LIKE TO GET ME CLOTHES AS PRESENTS...buy them at AA (small or extra small) and then we can avoid both of us feeling awful because they don't fit.

Oh and the beer pamphlet I contributed on came out finally. Too bad my section (the playlist) is completely fucked as far as formatting and typos go. Thank god it wasn't my fault. Hey, I made it to a masthead though!

(While searching for honey baked ham pictures I found this. Hilarious.)

I Could Fill Up A Lake With All The Things I Didn't Say

2008-12-21T15:27:00.005+11:00

Okay the mission of the blog obviously didn't work while my father was in town. Short sweet often posts will be the norm now though, promise.

This one will have some pictures and that's about it.

I got a promotion. I am now the associate editor of http://www.threethousand.com.au
Now I work 2 days a week instead of 1. How neat.

The weather was shit while dad was here, but I still went to Meredith (I think there are pictures on Joan's blog...click it over there on the right) and had a good time. Final Fantasy was great, the Mountain Goats played with an acoustic guitar instead of all electric like in Denver, and they played 'The Best Ever Death Metal Band In Denton' which is a great song I never thought I'd hear live. There was a couple other great things about Meredith, and you can see my tops and bottoms here.

Dad and I ate well, he got sick, but not before we did a few things that were really great. We shopped a lot, so merry christmas! It's like 75 or so here in Australia. Hot christmas is going to be totally random.

The radio show is going well, the program director gave us a whole lot of really harsh criticism. Whatever. If he doesn't like it he can kick us off. (that's not to say we won't try to fix some stuff and go along with it)

The work Christmas party was good, no DJ set for me. But whatever! We all got just a LITTLE bit out of hand, but it was great.

Happy late Channukah to all you jewish friends. We know you killed Christ but that's totally fine if you don't believe in religion anyway! Keep it up.

Merry Christmas to everyone, here are some pictures.

Emily (one of my housemates) is leaving and it was her going away party yesterday. So we sat in the garden, manufactured a shady couch area, and had an incredible day of drinking in the 80 degree weather that my father had just missed out on. In fact, this is where I am typing this entry from, because it's another great day, and drinking a beer out here is almost perfect.

These are all pictures from the Great Ocean Road. It's a coastal highway that goes along the most breathtaking edge of Australia. From top: The 12 Apostles (only some in this picture), Me being a douche on the phone, Me hanging out on a beach.

These two are for the people who ever ask me about my neice and nephew. They rule. Anders up top and Cecily down with the fish. Cuties.

These last two are for people who always ask me about Lake Powell and my father's houseboat. They are sorta blurry, but who cares.

That's that.

The Telephone, It Just Doesn't Seem To Do

2008-12-04T13:52:00.007+11:00

Jesus. This is like life homework these days.

I have resolved to a) make these posts more often so I don't have giant entries to pummel through, and b) make them funnier because they have been lacking in the funny department lately.

Sierra came and visited!
I could write volumes about this, but we're going to go with the quick synopsis + pictures. Phillip Beach, Zoo, Museums, Thanksgiving, and lots of awesome bar crawling.

Pictures: My twice baked potatoes, our thanksgiving, me driving (on the wrong side of the road, with the steering wheel on the wrong side too) and looking metal.

It was tons of fun, and really nice to just hang out with her. It's always super easy and we get along really well so it was just like hanging out back in Boulder, minus youtube clips since my internet is slow. Oh except this clip about Obama supporters having nothing to do now.

Work is going good...still struggling to get the music page together but I think I might have a way to at least start getting some new stuff done. I am now going to be hosting an hour long radio show on Triple R for Three Thousand (along with Penny, my editor, and Kirsten, another contributor). Basically this information makes a lot of my friends down here sorta jealous as Triple R is...well...the hippest. Along with this, I'm going to try to start the music coverage on Three Thousand with a music filled podcast...hopefully that will get me a bit more $. As well, I got a project for the city of Melbourne's Lost & Found. It's like a tourist pamphlet. I will be actually published. In print! But yeah, an American who has been in the city for 5 months writing about the secret places in Melbourne that you have to visit when you come. What. The. Hell. I've also done some more interviews that should get me more $$. Still waiting on it though.

Fran, my housemate went back to Alice Springs for 2 months. And Emily is leaving in January. It's going to be weird, I have to find a new housemate with Sheridan. Which will be interesting.

I talked with Jen the other day for 12 hours over the internet because we are nerds. My eyes and carpal tunnel felt fine. Really.

I went to my first rooftop cinema last night, it was pretty crazy. This movie called Liquid Sky which is basically like a cult classic psychedelic movie. I wish I did drugs so I could have actually understood the damn thing. It was pretty funny though...I suggest it for anyone that likes (appreciates?) crap like Moonwalker.

My father has decided to come visit. It was about as random as could be, but he got a good deal and will be here this Sunday through the 20th! So I get to do the whole tourist thing again! No really! I'm excited! Again!

Now...my current dilemmas:
a) What do I want for Christmas?
b) What do I get for people for Christmas?
c) Where do I get a credit card to afford these things?
d) How do I emigrate to Australia?

Okay...more updates coming soon...promise.

p.s. - Bookmark this page and this page and you can see all the articles I write whenever one gets posted.

You'll Be Hanging Round In Corner Stores, Trying To Catch Somone's Eye

2008-11-13T11:57:00.003+11:00

Okay okay whirlwind update.

Since my mom has been here, I have been just bumming around with her. She got here on a national holiday. A very very important one. Australians take the 4^th of November off to bet on, and watch, a single horse race. No, seriously.

We went to Dumplings since it was about the only thing open, (the cheapest eats in town!) which she loved. She was a bit apprehensive since I told her the place had been shut down many times for health violations…but it’s a Melbourne institution and experience, so whatever. E. Coli? Psh, we can handle it.

Since Dumplings we have moved on to bigger and better things. We went and did all the city touristy stuff, like pictures of Flinders St. Station, St. Paul’s, walk along the river, go through the laneways and most important of all: my office!

Anyways, she has about a million pictures that I will post sometime soon.

We went to the NGV again (which has all new stuff!) and the botanical gardens, which are like this dreamland fairytale grove right outside the city. It was a mindtrip. Went up to the Shrine of Remembrance and the Eureka Skydeck (88 floors up!)…both of which offer a really cool view of the city. The Skydeck lets you go out in a glass enclosed room sticking straight out from the building. We didn’t, because I didn’t want to piss myself and cry in front of all the nice people, but it looked pretty intense.

We have eaten at all the good restaurants: Von Haus, Blue Chillies, Concorde Crepes, Claypots, and Cookie…which was incredibly overhyped, but at least we got Trampoline chai ice cream to cool off the insane burning of our mouths from the ‘way too many chillies’ found in Cookie’s Crunchy Fish Salad and Duck Salad. Thanks Cookie, couldn’t taste shit for half this week.

Joan and I went out to see the Lucksmiths for their album release. It was really good, and the new album is really good, and the band that opened just blew me away. Some of the best music I’ve heard in ages, and I think the best band in Melbs. Find them on myspace, The Harpoons.

Mom and I booked a last minute trip to Cairns (pro: Cannes…pro: CANS) to go out on the great barrier reef. Sadly mom couldn’t snorkel really well, so she took the submarine tour instead, what a pity right? Snorkeling was AMAZING though. It really is like they make it seem in those stupid nature programs. It’s not stupid though, totally amazing to swim all day with fish and coral and rays and shit. I saw a fish the size of me, it was a bit scary to be that close…but oh well, no stingray tail through the heart no foul. Oh but I did get all stung up by some jellyfish, although seeing them up close was WELL FUCKING WORTH IT. I love jellyfish. Plus we got to eat kangaroo, crocodile, and barramundi in the TASTE OF AUSTRALIA! (which was just an overpriced meal at Buccaneer Bill’s Seafood Inn, no, I’m not joking. That’s the name of the restaurant.)

We got out to Phillip Island again, JUST in time to see the penguin parade. Really, it’s just a mass of tiny little penguins marching up from the beach all the way their little habitat and homes. They are really cute, but they don’t let you take pictures of them, so we have none, even if mom tried to sneak a few. The beaches on Green Island (where we went snorkelling) are coral, and hurt, and suck x100 so it was a nice change of pace to go back to that massive beach I had taken pictures of and posted up here before. The weather was great, and we got out on time, got fish and chips at San Remo, and then drove the couple hours down to Wilson’s Prom. It was really really cool, the beach we went to in Wilson’s Prom squeaked under your feet when you walked and it was such a weird experience. Joan and I got videos…which will be up soon. I guess it’s the only beach in Victoria that squeaks, but up north they squeak a lot. It’s just something to do with the fine sand, although wikipedia said it was volcanic crystals or something. Whatever wikipedia, make me sound like an idiot some more. I should never trust you.

All and all I think it has been a great trip, it’s been wonderful for mom, considering she hasn’t been out of Colorado area (surrounding states) in about 15 years. Hopefully she catches the travel bug.

Anyways, other than the mom stuff, not much has been happening. I interviewed Mike Relm a week or so ago, and it got put up on the Good Vibrations festival website for everyone to see…which is neat. I interviewed Digitalism for a festival they are coming to Oz for. It was really fun, and really cute. Jens (one of the Digitalism guys) was really fun to chat with. I finally have a full on meeting with Barrie and Robbie and Frunch to propose my ideas to increase the music coverage of the site. I gave them my big one a few weeks ago but didn’t have adequate time to talk about implementing it. I also don’t know what I’m going to propose to make a music blog that isn’t totally lame…besides what I already gave them. We will see. Hopefully thought it gets put into motion because I could use the raise/money I am expecting from this.

In other news: Ginger Beer is a fucking beautiful creature, even if it is non-alcoholic.

Well here are some trip pictures to keep you held over!

Oh and I got a haircut and shaved my beard. How cool eh?!

I Want Poetry, Music, and Some Maps

2008-11-03T16:31:00.008+11:00

So my mother gets here tomorrow. HOW EXCITING!?

I don't know what we are going to do, but we will figure it out. Probably a day trip to Phillip Island and maybe Wilson's Prom. I don't know what the second one is (besides a little penusula), but supposedly there is a beach on it that that squeaks when you walk on the sand. What? I don't get it either. Australia is full of crazy shit.

My mind was blown the other day because I found this:

Ubiquity for Firefox from Aza Raskin on Vimeo.

I really don't know how to cope with this stuff. Technology is getting really cool.

I have been at the library all day stealing the fast internet to download stuff. I have fast internet at home again, but I really don't want to use it all up real quick. The girls and I still have to upgrade it so we have more than like 2GB of data to go through.

I watched Candyman last night with my housemate Emily. She is pretty rad, and she's sorta Jewish I guess. The first Australian Jew I have met. It was always weird to me how many Jewish people I knew back in Boulder...because I never met any outside of that. Growing up I knew none, but come college, I'm flooded by them. They are everywhere.

Anyway, the point of this Jewish tirade is...Candyman is a good horror movie from the dude who did Hellraiser but would have been better if the story wasn't so lame. Phillip Glass did the music.

Today I've been trying real hard to be witty, because I wanted to finish my work for this week before momma gets here but...I'm just not funny. And before you say "Oh Pat you were never funny." Don't. Because I just wrote in a newsletter that gets sent to TONS of Australians that thier grandmas were hot. THAT IS HUMOR. (HERE)

But once again, the point is I'm not witty today, and I'm sorry for it because it makes this post horrible and normal.

Here's something to make it better I guess:

p.s. Let's hope Obama wins, even if he won't make it through the first year.

Is It Any Wonder That I Hang My Hat, And Does It Really Matter?

2008-10-28T11:43:00.002+11:00

She Won't Have A Thing To Do With Me, A Thing To Do With Me

2008-10-27T14:47:00.001+11:00

This is for my father.

Kentucky Fried Chicken here does not have biscuits. They do however, serve everything with fries. And they have all these crazy menu options, including these fillets that are battered up in original recipe and are amazing.

Just giving you the full report pops.

Ce Soir, Je Vais Boire

2008-10-25T17:53:00.004+11:00

The days are just whipping by. It was Joan and I's 4 month anniversary the other day. How crazy is that? To all of you who graduated with us: WE HAVE BEEN ADULTS FOR LIKE 5 MONTHS.

Work paid me. Which is great. I presented my new ideas to them, and they ate it up. I think I might be able to be employed there for a full time type job. I'm hoping so at least. I figure I can live quite well on double what I'm making now, and anything over that I can save...which would be extra great. Plus they seem like a company that might front $ to keep me here, especially if they can deduct that money later :)

I am an independent contractor, again. I did it with Spectre, but now I'm back to having my own company registration number and submitting invoices. How adult. How terribly adult.

My new house is really good. It's got a big full on kitchen. It's got a giant back yard. It's got room mates that are mature, have jobs, and don't fuck with you. It's got room mates that are hilarious and just as inappropriate as me. The internet sucks more than the old house, but I think we are going to change that, which is needed. I just hope that when the girl who's stuff is all furnishing my room comes back she doesn't kick me right the fuck out! But c'est la vie.

I got one of the best presents since I've been here in the mail the other day.

Thank you so much Sierra. Artwork on my body and all over my room! No, I haven't put up everything yet...but soon!

Speaking of Sierra! She is coming to visit me. It's more than I can say about the rest of you slackers.
It's going to be a blast, and I'm getting super excited for it. I am probably equally excited about how awesome it will be when my MOM comes to visit in 2 weeks! She has been out of the united states about, twice. No joking. SHE IS COMING TO AUSTRALIA! It is going to do her head in. We might go to Tassie, Great Barrier Reef, Wilson's Prom, Black Spur Drive, Phillip Island, and New Zealand. Well obviously not all of them, but those are the ideas. Oh I'm so excited to have visitors!!! Dad, get down here for 100+ Christmas time.

I have been foiled by my local library. Out of the following books, they have NONE. So that means I might have to buy one (once I get paid again). The booklist: Play it as it Lays - Joan Didion, The World to Come - dana Horn, Arkansas - John Brandon, Here They Come - Yannick Murphey, Voyage Along the Horizon - Javier Marias, Wonderous Life of Oscar Wao - Junot Diaz, Goodbye, Columbus - Philip Roth, and The Ministry of Special Cases. Tell me which to buy first!

Oh and I didn't finish Roberto Bolano. I might get back to it, but for the time being it's going to rest over there in the "Got boring real quick, this author should've gotten back to the story" pile with A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius.

Alright, I don't remember what else I wanted to post about, so this will have to do! Oh and there will be a video uploaded real soon, I just have to wait for my slow internet to get it up.
BE EXCITED.

Good times are coming, but they sure comin' slow

2008-10-10T19:23:00.004+11:00

Hi Patrick,

Thank you for putting in an application for the publicist position at PBS.
We've had a lot of applications for the role and unfortunately your
application has been unsuccessful this time.

I appreciate you taking the time to put together a proposal and wish you
all the best.

Again, another position I thought I was perfect for, and don't even make it to the interviews. WHO ARE THESE OTHER PUBLICISTS, and why don't they find jobs already, and why do they have more radio experience than I do...independent radio experience...and fundraising knowledge, and what the hell.

Anyways. Three Thousand is going well, at least the whole writing thing. The paying thing? Not so well. I guess it will work itself out, I'm just freaking out since I'm moving and that's going to put a cramp in my finances. The other problem is that if I don't get a raise or something like they sorta wanted to give me, I'm not going to be making any money except to cover rent so I will need another job, or a wealthy sugar mama. I'm open to many many situations, please contact. Hell you don't even have to be wealthy, I'm cheap.

I am moving again. New house pictures will be up soon. It'll be good I think. Trying to find a place with the girls, that they both want, that I am okay with, at the price we want, was getting tricky. Luckily within a few days of looking, I found a house with people I liked, a location I liked, and a price that was unbeatable. I'm going to be living close to Joan, and close to trams, and close to cool stuff...plus I'm going to have a cat, 2 chickens, and 3 guinea pigs. It's like moving back in with people from Boulder, who have a little more room than anyone did in Boulder. The Brunswick Bubble.

Oh and just for all you lovely people who want to send fan mail:
14 Pitt St.
Brunswick, Victoria
3056
Australia.

Please include a SASE and picture, or two.

I made Mexican the other night and had to use a cough syrup measurement thing as a measuring cup. It was insane. Just so you know, 8x30ml = 1cup. You can't get that conversion anywhere easier than here.

Speaking of conversions, why doesn't everyone who reads this blog whip all their money out of the market right now to keep my exchange rate really good until I use up all of my USD? Pretty please? I'm getting 1.30 to 1 right now!

Oh and a quick synopsis of Phillip Island. It was fun, it was beautiful, it had amazing fucking beaches, it had gigantic waves, I found wafer (!!!) thin skipping rocks EVERYWHERE. WAFER ROCKS. Skipped one like 10 times, so good. Anyways, it's amazing. I plan on taking everyone who comes down to it, so GET READY.

So with all of that, I'm going to set up for more packing. I want to finish before I go out tonight.

Music rants:
Munly has a new CD? Why didn't any of you assholes tell me? Yo, I'm pissed.
Loving the new Mark Barrage (he's from Melbs!). Like a little bit denser and better YACHT or Dan Deacon. I cannot stop listening to Graham Smith/Kleenex Girl Wonder. It's like a disease or something. Ponyoak just keeps getting better and better, and I only liked it for that one Anne Marie song at first. Same with Mojave 3. I used to not dig them cause they were a wanky version of Slowdive...but they've grown on me so much. My Life In Art is a daily must listen song. I am looking forward to sitting down with Out of Tune, Neil's solo disc Sleeping on Roads, and that unreleased Slowdive album I Saw The Sun.
As far as new stuff? Look what I started using again: http://www.last.fm/user/patcollins
Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't...get used to it.

Her Space Holiday's new one is good. Might be different than the stuff I love him for (Young Machines/Manic Expressive) but it is fucking good still. I didn't like that last one.

Psapp's new one is burning to be played, as well as the Micah P. Hinson 7in, the Viking Moses, Tahiti 80, Kitsune 6 compilation and the load of stuff I downloaded at work the other day. Something new from Graham Smith's little pool that you can get free at www.hugebig.info (and his newest 2xCD for free too!), the new Congotronics (I'm SLOW), and the new Strut release...Calypsoul or whatever.

Lot's of new stuff! Tell me more tell me more! Oh and I don't give a shit about Yo! Majesty, so leave me alone.

I Can Decide, While I'm Alive, I'll Feel Alive

2008-09-29T01:32:00.006+10:00

Phillip Island...stories to follow. 27/09/2008

Take me on a trip, I'd like to go some day.

2008-09-26T13:21:00.002+10:00

Recap of last night:
Wendy James sucks as a DJ and couldn't rock a crowd if her gold sequined jacket depended on it
Macca's is cheaper than Hungry Jacks, helllls yeah.
I am in love with this song, holy, shit.

You are a beautiful and violent word

2008-09-23T17:12:00.004+10:00

The Savage Detectives by Roberto Bolano is pretty good. I've come to realize though, it was only recommended to me because of how extremely perverse it is. Thanks. I like to get books I have some interest in, but I know you thought I'd just dig bohemian poets having lots of sex. I know what you think of me now.

The new job is great, and I think it's turning into something like the radio station. I am completely ready to give up my free time to do work stuff, and write things for them, and do whatever they need really. I dig it. Unfortunately today they decided that the worst lollies in the world (candy) were U.S. Spice Drops. Screw them, the line has been DRAWN.

No really, it's a great place to work I think. I have my own little center office desk, I get to sit there and laugh at youtube videos they send me, and I get to be a writer. How crazy is that?! I'm a writer. I have my own byline and everything. PSYCHED. If you want to see it, just shoot over to www.threethousand.com.au. One of my reviews is up there (it's the Isaac Hayes tribute album) and I do the copy for the www.threethousand.com.au/mixtapes section. As well, I will have another review this week for a band called the Delta Spirit, and 2 reviews of things to do at the Melbourne Arts Festival. Really, Patti Smith is reading Ginsberg poems while Philip Glass plays in the background; DJ Spooky is showing a documentary about the sound of ICE in Antartica; and the Schonberg ensemble is playing Gyorgi Ligeti and Schonberg pieces...plus more. MELBOURNE YOU'RE COOL, let's date.

Anyways, job is pretty good, people are super rad, dogs haven't been into work lately...what slackers. I'm coming up with some ideas to extend my work, and they want a proposal by Oct. 14th so I have to make something happen. I'll get it done I guess!

My hair was cut for the cost of making curry. Fair trade.

I finished a disco mix so go tell me what you think. Some of the songs are EQ'd sorta gross...but we will see what the clubs think of it. Maybe I'll get a gig.

That's it for now. I will leave you with this video that I absolutely died for.
Fun with gas.

You were a shining star, it's been dark since you've been gone.

2008-09-12T23:06:00.000+10:00

Okay okay okay. It's time for a recap.
Since I've been gone from the blog (I promise, I'll go on another rampage soon) many things have happened.

I had way too much to drink on Joan's birthday. I don't even remember a good portion of it. Drinkers remorse x100. Plus I spilled wine ALL over my Parenthetical Girls shirt. (((GRRRLS)))!

I got real down over not having a job and just sorta wasting away, but I snapped out of it. Back into the saddle, still hunting for jobs.

I DJ'd the other night. My first paying anything in Australia! They gave me $50 for a 1hr set. Plus 4 drink tickets and 5 guestlist spots. Too bad my room mates didn't come, but Lulu and her room mates (the people I knew for the least amount of time in Australia) came out and danced and actually had fun. Which is to say a lot because...well...the club is sorta...ehhhh. Not bad, but the people who go are young (the beard was a dead giveaway of old guy) and they only wanted to hear hits...like Shoop and Gettin' Jiggy Wit' It. Remember how I said Australians are obsessed with the '90s? Exhibit 10.

It was good though, fun. I was sorta dressed up and it got hot so I had come prepared with short shorts and an undershirt. when the last DJ came on after me she said "Are these your pants?!" and then laughed when I told her it was hot hot hot.

Went to another art exhibit. It was Danae's! She does good stuff, for real. If I could afford it, I'd buy it. But I feel like that with a ton of my artist friends' stuff (COUGH COUGH SIERRA). Maybe I'll get her to design me a tattoo so I can get the art for free too. FOREVER.

My rent plummeted because they are selling the house and are having a LOT of house inspections (as well as coming over at 830 to put in MULCH. SHUT THE HELL UP OLD LANDLORD GUY). That stretches my money a bit further though!

So I went nuts trying to get a job the other day. Messaged a TON of clubs to get more DJ gigs, and for some reason...it sorta worked! I have to drop off demos at a couple places. Plus I got a job at www.threethousand.com.au doing music stuff. They are starting me out 1 day a week (PAID!) and then I'm going to work into a bigger role if I can give them something to make me do. They want to expand the music section of the website and so...I'll be up for it. It's a really cool company, there are 2 dogs (they are english bulldogs?) who are like little aliens. They rule. Ping Pong table as the meeting table, and 3 bars in the same building, as well as the rooftop cinema they own! BLING BLANG SUCKAS. In addition to the job hunt, I finally got a callback from Universal. They gave me a quick informal phone interview...well I thought it was informal. I was naked for god's sake. And I think I said some hilariously inappropriate things, but yeah, I think she liked me. That would be pretty wonderful too, especially if it was in addition to threethousand. Cross dem fingas. But yeah, DJ gigs + Three Thousand should be enough to cover rent. Not going to make me lots of savings...but alright for the time being.

Renata is a new friend who is a) polish, b) pretty cool, c) maybe taking joan and I to phillip island...where there is...GET THIS...a PARADE OF PENGUINS EVERY DAY. Like they come out in a big line and waddle their way somewhere. I don't know the specifics, but there is a PARADE...of PENGUINS. As well, her friend Cat has a summer house or something in Golden Beach, which I was officially invited to. Check it.

I applied to volunteer/work for the Falls festival, and I didn't get a ticket to the Meredith music festival ($200 was a bit steep for 3 days with 2 good bands). I hope I get to see what the fuss is about these music festivals in Australia. Note to the US, don't go all festival based. It's too expensive and it sucks compared to small shows. But Falls festival is like in a rainforest...and next to the beach. TAKE THAT.

Okay...let's see. There's tons of more things that have happened, but I can't think.

My foot has been hurting a LOT. It feels like I broke it or something on the side. Totally hurt. I want to just NOT stand on it for like 2 days.

Be excited for mail...you might have had something in my last ship out.

JOB on Tuesday! My official job is making 10 song mixtapes and writing articles. Give me a theme.

Megan and Fatti broke up for like 6 hours or something. I was home, they were broken up, I went and ate a picnic, went to bed, and they were back together. Thank god they updated the facebook relationship status or I would've never known.

Kavalier and Clay was a fantastic book. So so sooooo good. Now I need another. Still looking for those book requests as the library likes to a) not have what I want b) loan out everything that they do have that I kinda want. I'm digging Chabon's novels...but they have crap endings so...give me somethin' with a good ending.

Getting pretty serious about Vietnam. Super excited about child labor and black market dvds. Hells yes. Put in your requests before I go. No promises it won't just be a ton of porno.

Haven't talked to my family in a while. Yo fams. If you're there, let me know you arn't dead...I know a few of you (ONE IN PARTICULAR) have internet at home. Nerd out with me. We can do the whole video chat thing. I'll even put on clothes for it.

My house uses more toilet paper than I thought humanly possible. I don't get it. I think next time I'm going to buy like 1 roll and throw it in there and see who fights over it.

We made puppy chow...which is a mystery to not only our Australian friends, but also a few of you back home. Let's see... peanut butter + chocolate melted into Chex cereal coated in powdered sugar? Yep, it's delicious and you missed out. Tell your parents they screwed you up.

Biore pore strips do not work anymore. What happened? I want to see that gross stuff come OUT of my nose! Ughhhhh.

I got called a ranga today, from this guy who looked like a construction worker. I didn't have time to snap back a witty 'fuck you' comment, so instead I gave him some death eyes. I should've just run up and kicked his smug fat face sitting in his little lame truck.

My hair is too long, but unless a friend cuts it, we're growing it out until I can afford a nice haircut.

Music steez:
August Darnell collection on Strut just gets better and better with each listen. As well, going back to the Mantronix Souljazz release...holy shit. Mt. Eerie has an AMAZING new album out with Julie Dorion and Fred Squire. Can't wait. He is coming to Australia soon!!! This band...Detektivbyrån suck. They start out really pretty like Goon Gumpas Aphex Twin styling...but then they throw in some 1992 web based midi sounds that make it a fucking joke. Don't waste your time...I only did because it was popular on waffles.fm. Last time I trust those dudes. David Vandervelde's new one isn't bad either. Standout track 'Someone Like You.' In other news, 10cc's Dreadlock Holiday is a jam. Jam jam jam.

Can't wait for Cosmic Balearic Beats, the new Sea and Cake album, Mac Lethal's mixtape, and Eddy Current Suppresion Ring. Oh and the Brutals (from Australia) played a heap of old stuff that sucked, and a bit of new stuff that was real good the other night. I'd look forward to that.

DANCE PARTAYYYy

2008-08-26T19:48:00.000+10:00

You can go here and download my mix. It's nothing special really, but any comments would be appreciated.

www.myspace.com/djpatacake

or

Pat a Cake - Fucking Marsupials!

Tracklist:
Junior Boys - Double Shadow
Metronomy - My Heart Rate Rapid
Passions - Emergency
Britney Spears - Toxic
Heartsrevolution - Switchblade (LA Riots mix)
Criag Obey vs The Church - Under the Milky Way
Switch - A Bit Patchy (vocal)
Shiny Toy Guns - Le Disko (Tommie Sunshine mix)
The Rapture - W.A.Y.U.H. (Claude Vonstroke mix)
Green Velvet - Shake and Pop
LCD Soundsystem - Yeah (Crass version)
Daft Punk - Harder Better Faster Stronger (vocal)
Spektrum - Kinda New (Dirty South mix)
Tiger Stripes - Survivor
Simian Mobile Disco - It's the Beat
Justice - Stress (Autoremix)

I'll teach ya how to STUNNNT

2008-08-25T11:41:00.000+10:00

You have 30 mins to finish the test, and at that time the alarm will sound, pencils must be put down. Use only number 2 pencils please.

This weekend was:
a) stupid and not nearly as fun as previously thought due to the party not being that fun and us meeting another creepy dude
b) as fun is to roller coasters
c) as this blog post is to hilarious
d) all of the above

Watching Beach House on Friday was:
a) Super great, even if I was sorta drunk, and it was packed. They played some great songs and were just as good as I was hoping.
b) alright
c) I don't remember I was drunk
d) I didn't even go see Beach House?

Interesting fact about Milkman Dan, he has no hair on the backs of his calves, and one summer wore only shorts so he could grow it back because he always thought it was from his tight jeans.
This story was:
a) cool
b) exciting
c) Only brought up to then bring up the fact that I have folliculitis all over my thighs because my jeans are too tight I think. Oh and I don't have hair on the tops of my calves either. Weird.
d) boring.

Maybe some of the best news came this weekend in the form of:
a) me finding out I'm pregnant
b) me actually getting offered to get paid for writing articles for Threethousand.com
c) me finding out I'm NOT pregnant
d) I"M HAVING A BABY!

Right now I am listening to:
a) Spanish rap
b) 50 Cent
c) G-Unit
d) All of the above (HEY IT'S THIS ANSWER! COOKINSOUL!)

Short essay section.

Please write a well formed essay, with a thesis, and supporting evidence on the topic:
How did I end up with a bump on the Back/Top of my head?

So yeah, the weekend wasn't as fun as I thought it would be, but that's alright. I just got a bit defeated by Melbourne I feel.
Waking up to good news though is great:

"We've got a few people helping in the office at the moment, and it can be
a bit overwhelming so I couldn't get you on for a few weeks. Also,
ThreeThousand's a bit of a shoestring affair. I'm really only paid two
days of the week to do it, and the rest of the time is spent scrambling to
get freelance stuff done.

One thing that would be helpful in the meantime, is sending through some
pitches/ideas for articles. I could commission them, if we haven't written
about that topic before. And you could write them."

Yay. Now to figure out what I can write about? Music? My life? America? Charming women?
What do I doooooooo.

Joan and I are going to the zoo today I think. That will be fun. We haven't been somewhere touristy in a while so...it's time to get back in the swing of things :)

Went to a couple of gallery openings that were fun this week. There are a couple more coming up, I might try to go check it out. Plus a lot of them have free booze. What's better than getting wasted and looking at art?! Getting wasted, looking at art, and making fun of people!

I burned my hand. Warning: Hot water bottles may cause severe burns if not used properly or being filled while drunk.

The world is a rope she wears

2008-08-19T23:43:00.001+10:00

A few fun things this evening. I went out to blast away CVs today...no one really liked me that much except for the girls at the Body Shop. Hey, that'd be nice! We will see. Tomorrow is "sit around and send the newly updated retail CV to any retail jobs on the internet."
We shall see.
The landlord is selling the house we live in, so we have to move now. Oh well! When you come and visit we can go to the beach still, it will just be a short tram ride!

Starting off today's hilarious and informative post, is something in reference to the song the title is taken from.
One of the next lines is "There is a color that smells like her hair"
This reminds me of a conversation I had a while ago with Joan, (and I have had it a few times with other people), about the strange occourance of Synesthesia. You know how people's senses get all mixed up when they are on LSD? Well that happens sometimes, to people, and leads to GREAT things. Maybe more times than not it leads to lots of hard learning problems...but hey, Liszt had it. We studied it a bit in Language, Culture, and Cognition and it's really interesting because sometimes people have it with numbers taking on certain colors (i.e. 5 is red 2 is blue, and a blue number can not divide a red number without a remainder). Totally amazing. Someone smack me in the head until I get Synesthesia, please. I would like to taste colors without having to do harmful (or maybe not so harmful) drugs.

Second on today's list is...missed connections. You know that section of Craigslist where people go "Oh I saw you, you are pretty, let's have sex." I love them. I love reading them and I absolutely love posting them. It's like, hey, here is a PERFECT opener, that I can think up in the comfort of my own home, be witty, cute, and creative...and put it out there as my first contact with you. First impressions right? On the other hand though...there are some weird ones, and Jen decided to give me a great one recently. You might remember Jen from her absolute great wiener dogs in banana costumes in banana boxes picture. She's great. Anyway, here is the missed connection, entitled Who left this note under my head as I napped?
Hilarious.

Last, but absolutely not least, I woke up this morning to 2 frantic messages (to my home AIM account, and my old work AIM account) from Hannah, my old boss in Portland, asking me what my email was. She had a great surprise for me, and I laughed a lot this morning when I received it. If she didn't buy it, if she saw this record and did not spend the money on it, I will literally kill her. I will send her anthrax in the mail and shit. Portland will feel my wrath if I cannot physically touch with my hands one day.

The hip hypnotist knows it is a good idea. I'm sure there are a few other people that would agree, and a heap of others that would say "That's bullshit." Whatever, it wasn't my fault.

I noticed that the phrase "How are you doing?" is becoming more foreign to me, due to the fact that Australians say "How are you going?" instead.

I AM ADAPTING TO DOWN UNDER. I WILL BE A FUCKING ABORIGINAL BY THE TIME I COME HOME. IT WILL BE NEAT.

Digeridoo championship will be the first themed party I throw.

A flower bloomed inside my cold cold heart

2008-08-18T23:52:00.000+10:00

Well well well.

Here we are again, reading about jews.
Of course, most of you know I'm not Jewish, but I believe Michael Chabon is. If he isn't, there is some serious jewenvy going on in his brain. No, he is, for sure, and once again I am reading one of his fantastic novels.

I finally finished 100 Years of Solitude, and as earlier stated, 50 years were quite enough. My one sentence review: Beautiful imagery and mysticism, although it all fell apart when the world of of the Buendia's became modern and ugly. Like for real, it should've stayed in the past. Thankfully though, that book is now in my past. I can start reading wonderful stories, about jews.

The Adventures of Kavalier and Clay is going to get me to start reading comics I feel. I don't know if I like that or not, but we will see I guess.

I was privy to some good news yesterday. First, Talor, a wonderful new friend of mine, called and said "HEY LET'S HANG OUT!" So we did just that. Sidenote, her name is said Taylor, but her parents were like, "Whoops, left out the y, oh well, she can just rhyme with valor for now on."

She had a few pieces of good news, mainly in the fact that she MIGHT know the guy who is possession of my CV at Polyesther records. She MIGHT be able to put in a good word for me. As well, she MIGHT get me a chance to meet the girl in charge of that website I've been flipping out for, www.threethousand.com. I sent them a little email being like "Hey if you need/want any help with anything, writing, slave work, whatever, let me know." Like most emails I have sent to people in this country, it has been wonderfully ignored. Australia, get with it, it takes half a second to hit reply, type "no", and hit send. Shiiiiiiiiiiit, this is nothing like what I thought the future would be like.

Talor also helped me to discover that hot water bottles (the full on rubber kind) might be one of the best inventions ever. I should've just gotten like 4 of these instead of the heater, and laid them all around me. Maybe I could make a little harness for them, add a few pounds sure, but I would have a refillable heater. Who knows, maybe it would be cool to just toss it in my backpack when I head to the city. That'd probably be pretty rad. I'm going to be the smartest person to ever own one of these things. It's only been like 12 hours and I already have extra inventions and uses for this simple heating device.

I have taken about 3 days or so to try and get my stupid $200 soundcard for my computer/dj setup to work. I was so fed up with it today, and I was hungry, which means I was extra extra fed up with everything. I got food, had a whiskey on the rocks, and sat down to TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS. Turns out, 2 processors, as opposed to common sense, do NOT make things work better in the DJ software I am using. So click that off, and poof, things work. Fuck you Ableton (that's the software).

I'm psyched, DJ setup almost completely stable, functioning, and ready to play out. Just have to make a couple example mixes and then pass them along.

Someone let their dog poop on our steps. How messed up is that? I'm going to kick every dog I see in this suburb for the next year. Watch out pooches, you're all dead to me.

I had to walk past 4 piles of puke the other night. St. Kilda: party nation.

Wednesday there is a bunch of couchsurfers (www.couchsurfing.com) going to see the tiny (TINY) penguins on the St. Kilda pier. Who's excited? This guy.

End transmission, I don't know what else there is to say. The lotto numbers for tomorrow are 18, 02, 47, 33, and 79. Powerball multiplier is 42.

It's beat time, it's hop time.

2008-08-17T16:33:00.001+10:00

I don't have much to update but there are quite a few pictures so we will probably just do it that way.

Last night Megan, Fatima, Joan, and I had burgers and sat around talking about farting for about 5 hours. I'm not talking like, oh every now and then we talked about farting, it was full on flatulence conversation mode for a LONG time. It was hilarious. That's why I love these girls.

I have discovered that I like poutine fries. Ya know, gravy + cheese?

Still no job. Still looking. Going to go insane if I don't get one soon though. Okay, well here's pictures. If something interesting happens, you shall be the first to know.

These are all kinds of out of order, so...we will just have to comment on each one to tell you what's going on:

Joan and I getting silly with a lychee fruit. They're sorta weird, I like the juice better.

Foooooooty. We went to the game today. Not a box, but real close to the field. We could've been front row but decided to let the crazy fans have their space.

Al (the older one), Gabe (the tiny middle one), and Hannah (the other tiny one) at the footy game. Al got us the tickets, it was a blast.

Me and Joan in our outfits for the Sweet Jelly Roll a while back. There is another one cominnnnng up!
Me the day after the Jelly Roll, looking dashing as ever I do say.

Megan has to wee.

Take 1, Mexican night #2.

Take 2, Mexican night #2. Left to right: Sandi, Danae, Eliza, Fatimah, and Olga with her massively burnt fingers.

These are my friends.

Fond memories of a wiener dog farm

2008-08-11T00:24:00.000+10:00

Forgot about this little ditty.

Thanks Jen.

Oh and most satisfying meal under $1.50? Ramen over rice with 2 spring rolls, soy sauce, and sweet chili sauce. IN YOUR FACE EXCHANGE RATE.

We were just two people in need, it doesn't have to be some fucked up tragedy

2008-08-10T18:27:00.000+10:00

Notable mentions in the life of Patrick Collins:
I made hollandaise sauce. How impressive right?! :) It was good, and the poached egg was alright...I didn't really cook it long enough and it was a bit runny in middle...so I will have to get better at that.

Joan and I went to a bar (well, we were wandering around Melbourne Central and stumbled upon) that had free champagne for ladies and cheap beer. Joan got drunky drunk and I had a couple pints. It was great.

The next day we went back, just to find some food, and found out that around closing time in Melbourne Central, the food court has deals on the remaining food. Tons of asian food, pasta, or pizza for real cheap.

Our next Thursday is PLANNED. Get drunk, go downstairs and get cheap food, then go get more drunk.

Today was gross out. It was cold, rainy, and boring. But it was a nice rest from the adventures of last night.

The most notable observation I have made about the house parties we have been to is that Australians a) like to dance, and are into it way more than American youth and b) Australians listen to (almost exclusively at the parties) 90s throwback and ironic music. Want some ODB, Britney, Justin, and the theme from Labyrinth all in the same set? Come to Australia. I guess it's alright, I will just have to remember to break out the Jock Jams when I DJ any house parties.

We went out last night to see some bands at the Forum again. Emily was going to come out and since we hadn't seen her in ages, I figured it was important to get some face time with her. Daniel came out as well, and we sat around talking for a few hours until the velvet clad jazz singer came on. Then we sat around and made fun of her. Emily digs her music/her, and that's nice, but it wasn't the best thing around. Joan and I are slowly coming to realize that Australia's music scene isn't nearly as rad as their exports would make it seem.

Anyways, so after many velvet jumpsuit jokes, we decided to run out to a bar that Joan and I heard about and hadn't been to see yet. http://www.thecroftinstitute.com.au/
The theme at this place is like...old high school chemistry room. It was great. Sandi joined us and upon learning that we wanted to go, she said "Well I don't really remember where it is but it is up off the worst rape alley in the city." She wasn't joking, and it was just like a mini maze of alleys to get to this place. Anyways, cool cool bar, a bit pricey, but probably worth it. We had a drink and then went up to Sandi/Eliza/Olga/Tereza's house to sit around for a bit before hitting the parties.

The next hour was filled with bad 80s disco videos, bad 80s music videos, and a hell of a lot of Kate Bush, who after one or so song I could do without. She's good, I get it, but she sounds like magic flute voice or a baby bat more terrified than it usually is.
Good conversations and the finding of a beer in Australia that I actually LIKE (FINALLY) led to a great night.

We took a $30 cab ride to buttfuckegypt (West Brunswick) and it was filled with more drinking (the ride got boring, it was long), lots of laughing, a strobe light of a camera flash, and us changing our destination 3 times on the poor cabby.

Party central when we got there though, well actually, pee in the street central because half of the 10 person party cab had not known it was a long ass drive and therefore did not prepare, myself included. Okay, so then it was party central, and we got up on the dancefloor, took over, had a blast, Megan lost her phone, I almost lost my glasses (thank god for Eliza's quick hands), and I realized after I drank half the bottle of wine that mixing spirits, beer, wine, and dancing was only going to end in pain. Puke in the street central followed by this-line-is-way-too-fucking-long pee in the street central again followed by another good hour or two of dancing. It was a blast.

We walked in the rain for a good 20mins, got baklava, then grabbed a cab back to Fitzroy and Olga/Eliza/Tereza/Sandi's house to crash on their couches. St. Kilda is too far away...I can't wait to move out now. Slept with a cat named Sailor for most of the night, woke up to Olga (the trooper) going out to work at like 7am after MAYBE 3 hours of sleep, and then woke up to go back to buttfuckegypt to get Megan's phone. My shoes and socks were still wet, which was the worst part of the day probably.

So now I'm back home, my internet is running fast (yay music downloadz), and I'm just hanging out for the night I think. Went and got me some food at the Safeway so I might get to cooking something sooner than later.

Good weekend, for sure.

p.s. Don't waste your time with the Avenue D - Grade D Beef (D sides) album, it's fucking horrid, and I love Ave D.

I reached out with good intentions, but I only did more harm

2008-08-09T13:26:00.000+10:00

Welllllllllllll Melbourne nightlife, impress me, come on.

Last night I went out with the girls, met up with Eliza and Danae and Olga and had a little drink at a place called Hell's Kitchen, then made it up to the so called late night hotspot of Melbourne. Some backstory: Melbourne bars used to not have a closing time, but in the past couple months they just started enforcing a 2am lockout, for most bars. There are a few that get past it somehow, and the one I have heard about most is Pony. Pony is supposedly a place where everyone goes after the other bars close and gets really sloppy. Megan says that most of the time it's just full of people making out and being ridiculously drunk. Oh and they have shitty bands play. Things were looking up when we got there because they were playing the Tenebre theme that Goblin does...but high drink prices and a less than packed house made Pony quite disappointing. Maybe we'll just have to get crazy and go there later. Met a new girl of the whole crowd last night, she was nice. And got to talk a lot with Olga who ISN'T from Warsaw like I thought. She is from Krakow which is like the underground hip city of Poland I guess. Maybe I'll visit sometime. I think I'd like that.

Joan and I found a map shop. Upside down, pacific centered maps are crazy. Absolutely crazy. If you want one let me know, they're like $10 each :P

Joan and I also walked along the beach yesterday. It was sunny, and nice, and we got to take off our shoes and just walk for about an hour. From South Melbourne beach back home to St. Kilda. It was really nice. Lot's of good conversation about an array of topics.

Once again my posters are falling off my walls. Come on blu-tack, get to it. I didn't want post-it glue for my posters.

Danae and I had a good chat about music. Joan and I went to see one of the great locals we've been hearing about last night. It was a free show, thank god, because there were so many people talking that we could barely hear the band. It was annoying, but I'm excited to see her for real.

Went to Von Haus, maybe not as hidden as I thought it would be, but totally good food and a great atmosphere. Romantic date spot for the real.

Mini breakdown the other night led to a frantic email. I think I wish I would've cut off a lot more contact back home, it would've made things completely easier I feel. We will see how many bridges I let crumble while I'm here. Bye.

I feel at home in Melbourne. I wish I had a job, but I really feel good here. I want to stay I think. I'm almost sure. If it happens, then great.

New music update:
Parenthetical Girls have a new CD out, lots of strings, just a furthering of the last one which was GREAT but...I like the sorta lo-fi ness of the first record. It was just so much less complicated. But I have only gone through this new one once.
Space Oddities is a record that got a review in the melbourne subcultural guide I've been sorta following. Sounds like space disco greatness.
Looking forward to: King Darves, The Philly Sound instrumentals disc, TZU, David Vandervelde, Laura Marling, and Jaguar Love.

Time to shower, time to get ready to do something.

Fatty wannabe, give me back my gut.

2008-08-06T10:19:00.001+10:00

Transcript from the first conversation I had this morning:
(6:07:19 PM) patrocks1190: LAURA
(6:07:25 PM) patrocks1190: You will so appreciate this dream
(6:07:41 PM) patrocks1190: I just woke up and dreamt that I found 4 boxes next to the bus stop
(6:08:09 PM) patrocks1190: 1 box of snickers and oreo flavored ice cream, like tubs and snickers bars and snickers drumsticks
(6:08:18 PM) patrocks1190: And then 1 box full of meat pie things
(6:08:24 PM) patrocks1190: 1 box full of veggie pie things
(6:08:34 PM) patrocks1190: 1 cylynder of giant oreos
(6:08:49 PM) patrocks1190: And 1 box of wafer bars with chocolate in the middle that looked way better than I can explain
(6:09:43 PM) laura: omg
(6:09:47 PM) laura: ARE YOU STARVING TO DEATH
(6:09:49 PM) laura: what is going on
(6:09:58 PM) patrocks1190: lol
(6:10:14 PM) patrocks1190: I want cookies and cream ice cream so bad

It's 10am. Man I'm glad I missed that first bus in the dream and had to talk to that annoying little kid until the next one came. Oh and my childhood best friend showed up, sup Brok. I never realized how crazy his name is until I just wrote it. I wonder what his parents were thinking. Anyway, this is a big deal since I don't dream much. In your face subconscious, I remembered this one!

I remember eating carrots last night, but by the looks of the ends next to my bed, I actually fed a entire family of rabbits with them. Cool...?

I have big plans of staying in bed until I am warm, putting eyedrops in my extremely Sahara-like eyeballs, and maybe leaving the house to go hang with Joan and get a tub of ice cream.

Comment that I woke up to and enjoyed immensly, from my sister: "...then I was just like, Batman should shut the hell up. He doesn't need to talk. In fact, he shouldn't talk at all. "

Runner up? Also from Sallie: "I also started reading my Biology book, which I also like, strange enough. I still can't say it was worth $99 used, but what the hell. It has leopards on the front, so at least it's pretty. "

haha.

Stalker's my style, and if I get caught, I'll deny, deny, deny

2008-08-06T01:28:00.000+10:00

It took a lot to get me around to listening to the new Why? album. Mainly because it made me very sad and I didn't want to deal with that. Now that I have though, it's just as genius as the first. So go get it and take it all in if you haven't.

The main points of this blog are what I have done today. This has consisted of making an Italo mix, online risk, a trip to Lentils As Anything, and going to see the new Batman movie.

The Italo mix was for Danae, who I think might be the most musically knowledgeable person we have met, maybe Emily. Who knows. Anyway, she likes talking music, which led to us chatting about some stuff and we got onto Italo disco. Italo is this genre of dance music, made in Italy (right?!) that was only made due to the economic inflation (ie no imports) of Italy, the availability of new instruments, and the separation from the death of disco in the states. Anyways, it turns out, from 2 different sources, that Australia may not have heard of, or experienced, the resurgence of Italo like the rest of the world. So I spent a lot of time making a little Italo mix for Danae including actually whipping it up in Ableton. It is pretty good, but not perfect, and since I didn't give it to her, I might do a new one tomorrow. Maybe it will help me get a DJ gig too, since she works at the Espy. We will see.

Online Risk is much more enjoyable. It doesn't take ages, maybe 30 mins/game. There are a lot of childish people on it though, so it's not always enjoyable.

So we heard about this place, Lentils As Anything that you can go get food, and then give whatever you want for the payment. They expect that you will give them more than the food cost and if you don't, someone else will. It's a REALLY cool idea, and since it's all just vegetarian lentils, rice, curries, and such...and the chefs and staff are volunteers, it seemed like a very...Boulder...institution. Joan and I went for dinner, and it was really hip, really cool, really small, pretty crowded, and very very good. The only problem though, which is sort of a big problem, right before we left, some man went to pay, dropped his $5 in the box, and the chef asked him how much he put in, which by itself is pretty rude when you're going to have a business that isn't supposed to care what you pay, right? So when the guy said $5, the chef then says "Oh that's not even enough to cover the ingredients" and was totally mean to this guy, who didn't have more money, so he left, as the chef continued to give him shit on the way out, and then talk about him, loudly, in front of all the other people, and how horrible that was. Anyways, obviously, Joan and I pulled out more cash than we had intended to pay, but we didn't want to get publicly humiliated. It just left a very very sour taste in our mouths, and went against everything the business was about it seemed. We thought about it, and we payed $14 for probably less than $5 worth of food, plus volunteer cooks. It just sucks, the ingredients are like rice and lentils, two of the cheapest foods in the world, which is why you probably make a profit at the 'pay what you want' pricing, so don't berate people for doing what you asked them to do. If you want a certain amount, put it on the menu, you'll still get customers. Blech. Okay, tirade over.

Batman was good but the little virtual reality like sequence near the end, in the building, made me want to have a seizure and puke all over everyone. Just to teach them a lesson that they need to not put crazy stupid shit like that in movies. As well, what was up with his voice? It was like "Okay, here, we want you to talk like normal, but you have to have this cough drop in your mouth at all times, and every now and then we'll give you a dose of chloroseptic so your tongue is numb as hell." "Like thiffss?" "Perfect. You sound absolutely retarded. Go fight crime."

Whateva, it was good. Way better than expected.

There are very few plans this week/weekend. We have a track suit party on Sat. for the olympic opening ceremonies or something. On Thurs. I'm being taken to a place called Von Haus, that is supposedly super hip and underground. Unmarked door, inexpensive food, expensive wine, 10 tables, 1 big bar, etc... I'm excited, just so I can act like I knew about it all along to people I show from here on out. Biggggg shotttttt.

The Stones in '65 want total satisfaction kid, but The Stones in '69 see grace in just getting what you need

2008-08-01T22:54:00.000+10:00

Because I did not plan, I am home tonight instead of at the Arthur Russel documentary. That's alright though, there is another screening of it and I will buy tickets online so as not to miss it again.

Since I am home though, I thought I should clarify some things that I realized are wrong in previous posts, as well as point out other strange things in the land of Fucking Marsupials. I hope you got that.

First, a retraction. My interning editor did not catch that in fact the Australian word for duvet, is not duvie, but instead, doona. He is now fired, and I don't look too stupid trying to fit in with the other Melburnians by saying doona. No I'm joking, we all look like jackasses when we say that word.

Second, another mistake by the former editorial staff of this blog, fanny is old slang here in Australia. No one uses it, and in fact, I get made fun of from Australians for using it. How terrible is that? Thanks for nothing whoever told me that.

So don't go running around propagating those terrible facts of mine. I promise to be a bit more vigilant in that area of the blog.

Also, two small facts to keep you up to date. Australian light switches are opposite ours, they turn on downwards. It's strange.

As well...according to a close source, Australians don't date anymore, they've moved on and are now to the point where they just, quoting from my source, "get drunk and fuck." I'm a very civilized person compared to these savages, and it's like I come from another time and world.

Okay, Fatti and I just got invited to a party so instead of sitting around like a bum, we'll go drink like some.

Bury your broken self and head out west.

2008-08-01T12:14:00.000+10:00

What do you do when you have nothing to do? Spend money.

No really. I have been doing pretty good with my budget. I just need to get some sort of income. I guess prostitution is creeping up quite quickly in the available options. Or porn.

I have officially forgotten all of the knots I worked so hard to learn in my last week or so with my family. I will relearn them though, because saying I know how to tie a French bowline sounds so sexy.

Today I got up before noon (accomplishment) and was able to experiment with something I have been waiting to figure out for a while now.

McDonald's egg mcmuffin (the only thing besides fries worth eating there) is completely different here. As well, I felt like quite a dolt while looking for it on the menu, because there is no 'egg mcmuffin' just a 'bacon & egg mcmuffin.' Gross right? Well bacon is just ham I guess so it was the same thing. But grosser. MMMMmmmm. I'm about to blow everyone's mind though here: Orange Juice from McDonald's is actually WORSE in Australia. I know I know, you're thinking "How in the hell can that even happen?!" and I will reassure you that it is not because it has dirt in it or something. It's actually just vomit in a cup with some Tang sprinkled on. Mmmmmm. Cherish your actual crappy orange juice in the states, because it tastes like Jesus in a cup (not his blood or anything weird like that) compared to this stuff.

That was the longest tirade about McDonald's I think I've ever even imagined. Oh and right after I thought it up, while eating it on my bed, I went back to sleep. 6am is way too early to be up when you can't even fill the 8 hours of your normal lazy ass day.

The girls found my blog and took offense to the 'tidy but not clean' comment. I figure I will set things straight for everyone. The shower curtain was covered in mold and maybe one of the worst things I've ever had to touch (and I've touched poop). The floor made Joan's feet turn black, but that's okay because Joan's feet are gross anyway (ZING). And the final thing that made me say that was the little cup they have to rest your toothbrush in the bathroom made my toothbrush handle sorta smell like mildew, which is my most HATED smell. Easily. Anyways, other than that the girls are wonderful, and Megan and Fatimah are full of wit and class.

Tonight is the Arthur Russel movie premiere and disco party. I have been talking about it all week, but I don't know if I want to go now. I am feeling very blah about it, especially since it was supposed to be in a garage (the party) like the old paradise garage days, but instead is at one of the sleezy, normal, downtown clubs. I feel like (and others have given me the impression that) Roxanne will just be full of people who I won't want to really be around, especially for something as lame (or actually amazing) as a dress up disco party. I wish it was just people who would want to come and know Arthur Russel, and move to the disco loft jams of the 70s/80s NYC. I guess I'm just too much of a snob. We will see. I plan on going to at least one part of it tonight, probably the movie.

Sigur Ros is also tonight, Joan and Megan are going.

I have resigned myself to buying a phone with a camera, so until I get a job and can afford that, no pictures unless they are from my laptop or from Joan. Who has some of our dress up night for the Sweet Jelly Roll. I bet they are on her blog. Oh and when I say phone with a camera, I don't mean some shitty cameraphone. They have cameras, with phones built in. Or at least that's what they market them as. Cool eh?

As far as new adventures...we have been pretty lame over the past few days. Just sorta trying to find jobs and such. We found a GREAT little breakfast place in middle park. Yummy poached eggs with hollandaise. It's really really cute, and the main waiter reminds me of Dave Sanford, my old boss from Spectre. Like, he looks exactly like him but is gay.

No big dinners really, the girls made a yummy curry that we ate out of coconut bowls they brought back from Vietnam, and Joan and I were going to make quiche but instead we bought a premade pack of 18 petite quiche. Yum. Megan's cousin is coming over and we are making food tomorrow though! It should be a blast, as I dig on our dinner parties. They are fun. As long as we don't invite the CREEPIEST GUY IN MELBOURNE. But I think we have that under control now that we know who he is.

OH! I forgot to mention how awesome Vietnam sounds from my room mates. They both got incredible coats, shirts, and shoes made (ON THE SPOT) for super cheap. They take like, 1 day and you pick out the fabric and get it fitted and everything! I'm like DYING to go over there now. It'd be so much fun to take a couple hundred and just go get a few suits fitted the way I like them and made up, a few fitted shirts, and a nice coat. Man! Eff Thailand and underage prostitution, we are heading to Vietnam for underage and underpaid workers! I love you Asia!

Okay, wrapping this up with a few thoughts.
New job leads:
Youth and Education Music Coordinator, 55k/year part time. This one is big, cross everything for me. I think I have what it takes, actually, I know I have what it takes, I just wish my dumb ass didn't submit my 'not-so-great' cover letter and instead wrote up a nice special one. But I was too excited and just attached and sent. Let's hope they get past that and read into my CV that Radio 1190 was a youth oriented station...that's the big point I didn't think I got across. www.theartscentre.com.au/employment

Experienced Copywriter
This one is funny, so I thought I'd shoot for it. Everybody has been telling me they like my writing style, I did copy for the station, we can hope. Plus, I feel at home with this company already, just from their job posting. It's... here.

As well, I handed out 7 or so CVs the other day to record stores down in Fitzroy. We will see, not expecting much from them.

The other thought for the day? How in the hell do I hang all my socks to dry when I have 40 pairs or something? Ridiculous. Oh and I hate the wind. Still.

This is the Rio Yeti book.

2008-07-26T12:33:00.000+10:00

Let's see! So much has happened in the past few days!

Okay not really, but Joan is back which makes my life COMPLETE. Or at least more complete. As well, Megan and Fatima are back from Vietnam. Which also makes my life more complete. I love them.

Let's seeee, it's been a while hmm?

I went walking down the coast again the next day, and it didn't rain on me. I got down to our little beach that is a bit nicer than the one right next to my house. It isn't much different, but it's a nice little walk to it!

I applied for 2 publicist jobs and another job at a radio station as an assistant manager. During Mexican night (sorry, forgot pictures again) I found out that the radio station is in Brisbane even though it was advertised in Melbourne. As well, the job at the Espy had been filled by the time I got my application in, and the last job is for a company that Emily said I wouldn't really want to work for. We will see, if I get the job, I'll go for it. If not, just have to keep looking I guess.

Mexican night was another success although had a few terrible things happen. Emily, a girl that knows Jess from Terrorbird in NYC, came over after a random invite from me two days before. She works in the music biz and is probably the best contact we've made down here in terms of that. She wants us to send off our resumes and cover letters and such, so she can forward them around. We will see. She was really wonderful though, we chatted forever about music and such. Andy, the first guy we met who showed us around and was so nice, came over and totally creeped everyone out. It was me, him, and 8 girls, 4 of which were lesbians in relationships, and he was just creepy as all hell. Good thing for me though, because it made me just look like a silly drunk! No, really, he said some things that were really scary and inappropriate and which I didn't learn about until the night was over. Sent him a good long "Hey, lose our numbers and don't come over again" text message the next morning. He was way out of line.

At least the people at the party were all quite okay with it. They thought it was funny, we had a few good laughs on his behalf the next morning because he was just so insanely off base. I like my friends down here so far. They're really good.

Figured out my DJ stuff, still trying to work out the mixes though, and then we'll get into the swing of things.

We went to a 9 acre farm/commune thing in the city yesterday. It was really cool, reminded me of Boulder co-op type places a lot, but was nice.

Last night we went out to the American Astronaut at ACMI (www.acmi.net.au). It was really fun, and I'm glad my room mates came and enjoyed it. I was deathly afraid they were going to hate it, because they didn't like Wet Hot American Summer, and then they wouldn't want to see any of the movies that I liked anymore. hah.

Check out all the cool stuff happening in Melbourne! www.threethousand.com I found this by chance the other day and am completely psyched! We are going to the Sweet Jelly Roll (the 50s rock and roll show) tonight so we have to go out and get some clothes to dress up. Excitttttting.

And then next week there is a screening of the Arthur Russel movie, and then a big disco party afterwards!!! And Emily is helping to put it on, so small world Melbourne!

Sierra said that some people say 50 years of solitude is enough. Agreed.

New music digs: Mirah's new one is incredible, Noah and the Whale are a favorite, there is a new Bob Log III that I haven't gotten yet but am excited to hear because, well, I love him, Black Kids is boring and way overhyped, Junior Boys put out a little mix that is alright, this Brooklyn band Crystal Stilts is pretty good, just an EP though, finally got ahold of the Hercules and the Love Affair CD and am reminded that I hate Anthony...so I like 3 songs on it, Ponytail suck, and there is a new Hauschka that I haven't listened to yet!

That's the update I guess! I don't know what else there is to say but I'm sure I will think of something next time that I left out.

Okay, no wit in this one, just a normal "Dear diary" because I'm feeling 15 and female.

Je suis un petit abricot.

2008-07-20T15:01:00.000+10:00

Well well well. Another installment of this hilariously boring blog.

I have not done anything neat in the last few days. I ate mediocre Indian food in the city, walked around a lot, went up to the Alderman for a drink and chatted with Aniki and Emma. Then got accosted by a 40 year old woman in a bar a few doors down. She was drunk as hell and all over me and I didn't know what to do, so I sat there and got played with until she got distracted and I snuck out. Whew, close one.

The next day I sat inside most all of it, and while trying to find answers to some DJ problems I was having, I found out that one of the few DJs I've actually been listening to regularly was playing, THAT NIGHT. So out I went to see In Flagranti. He played at 2a, I got there at 11p, so I was wasted by the time he came on. I puked in the bathroom (first time in Australia, I'm doing better!) and went out to sit and listen to him spin. I met a bloke named Brad who was really nice and we chatted for a long time, laughed a lot, and drank. I didn't get any of his info though. It was a brisk hour walk home or so, and that was helpful for the state I was in.

I got home and confessed my love to Jessie though, who, while I do love, as a friend, is probably extra creeped out by it. Jessie, love you tons, but I think we both know how our relationship would turn out. You beating me up and me staying in the kitchen and never going out anymore.
Yesterday I left the house once, because I was quite hungover. I got in at like 4a or something (I left early) and slept till 2. Then said "screw it, I'm staying inside and doing fuck all." I got Doritos, and soda, and did just that. Although I did watch a footy game, that was EXCELLENT.

I found facebook boggle, so I've been pretty much addicted to that. But my internet just went back to being slow as hell today, so I'm guessing it won't work anymore, because nothing really does when you're on dial up speed being shared between 3 computers.

American Astronaut is playing on Friday, and I will make a date of it if I have to kidnap some girl off the street and put her in a cocktail dress. I think a friend of a friend (Olga from Warsaw!) will be the one to go with me though, just to have a ball, dress up, and watch probably the best movie I've ever seen, on a big screen. I believe Joan is going to come as well, and hopefully my room mates!

I applied for a job as a publicist for the Esplanade Hotel here in St. Kilda. It's a popular venue, and an institution I guess here in Melbourne. I think I have the skill to do it, as long as they won't mind an American. We shall see. The cover letter was only 200 words, but it was witty and got the point across, and my CV still looks very good, and I reordered some things so they come first under responsibilities of my jobs. I think it's on point. Other than that, there's been no leads for jobs. This is harder than I thought...but then again, I don't want to wait tables really.

Today I went walking, down the coast a bit, and then it started to rain, which sucked, so I came back home. I will maybe look around on a map and see what's close and if there is anything fun around. My room mate said there is a giant banana and strawberry somewhere in the city. There was an architectural tour of downtown today, called Open House Melbourne. But I didn't want to go into the city really, and I don't know how into it I would be. Oh well.

This One Hundred Years of Solitude is good, but it doesn't make me want to pick it up and finish it. It just is like a time killer...which is fine, but not nearly as engrossing as the other books I've read recently. I think I'll be relieved to start The Adventures of Kavalier and Clay.

The DJ gear I wanted doesn't work with my computer so I have to spend about $50 more on something less cool, that should work. I'm still compiling some mixes, so we will see. Once I get the song lineup at least...and my midi controller working perfectly...I will probably shell out the cash to finish the mixes and be ready to play out.

Hopefully I'll have a job by then! :)

Fun facts for your day:
Rooting is slang for sex here. Fanny means vagina. Therefore 'rooting with your fanny pack on' is a hilarious statement. As well, the Australians think it is funny when us Americans say the word 'dirty' because it sounds...well...dirty, rather than pertaining to dirt or unclean. I think this is much like how when Stacey used to say 'naughty' I would think it sounded sexy and mysterious and fun...yeah.
Dookie means nothing at all to the Australians, which makes a town named dookie hilarious. Because there is one.
As well, they have signs for powernaps. Like on the side of the road, billboards that are like "You need a powernap!" or ones that are like town signs, "Powernap - 4km" Ridiculous.
Lemonade is lemon/lime soda. Like Sprite. As well, there is no Diet Pepsi. Marketing told Pepsi that 'diet' has a negative connotation so they changed the name to Pepsi Max. And no, it isn't like the new energy Pepsi that we have, I made this argument to Joan and lost. Root beer is no where to be found, which is very VERY sad. As well, Dr. Pepper is a specialty cola, they don't sell it except in special little places. I found Sierra Nevada Pale Ale in a specialty liquor store down the street. It costs $7 a bottle. Someone will HAVE to bring me some from the States, I might even see if you can just ship it in for me. No New Belgium or anything of the sort, even at the specialty beer store. Boo, sunshine and mothership are needed as well in the beer package.

That is all for now. We shall be making more Mexican food for our friends on Thursday I believe, so this time I will take pictures!

Beards arn't supposed to be on babies.

2008-07-15T17:46:00.000+10:00

Joan and I have been going baby crazy. It's stupid, every kid I see I just want to pick up and take with me. I'm missing my little niece and her running around like she had crack for breakfast. I told Joan I wanted to grab this little baby and just rub my beard all over his tummy (he was a porker) and she said "Beards arn't supposed to be on babies, they have sensitive skin!" Whatever, beards on babies, it'll be my new nanny company. All the babysitters will be bearded fellows who enjoy those beards being rubbed on little kids. I'm sure we have a specialty niche of parents who only want the best for their kids.

As far as fun things, I said I went to the aquarium. It was nice, but really packed. They have giant rays that are around 9 feet across, and some really cool leafy plant like seahorses. It's nice, minus all the people that have to document the aquarium like it was something they were going to show at their funeral. No, you don't have to get every angle on every stupid bright yellow fish, but you can do it and piss off the other people who are trying to see the exhibit all you want. Just don't expect me to move when you want a 40 minute artistic view of the jellyfish. Dick.

Joan and I have been walking a lot again. It's like the first few days when we got here. We don't have anything to do, we sent off tons of applications, haven't heard back, and now are just trying to think about what to do next. Joan is leaving for Newcastle for a week, so I'll be lonely, but that's alright. Maybe by that time I'll have more friends.

The guy who I bought the DJ gear from was really nice and came out and had a drink with us the other night. He told us how buying a house for yourself in Australia is horrible. I guess to get your interest tax deductible or something you have to not live in the house you bought. You have to rent it out. That seems weird right? Oh well, he's enlightened us on traveling and some other aspects of Aussie culture. As well, he's having a party soon and wants us to come. Yay to chance meetings in a music equipment store.

I will be making a few mixes and posting them somewhere, maybe here, so you can hear how neat mixing on a laptop is.

Joan and I went to an art deco exhibition at the Victorian National Gallery. Here's the info page for it. http://www.ngv.vic.gov.au/artdeco/

It was pretty cool, although again, it was packed. It's school holiday so it's the worst time to go to these things, but what else are we going to do?! Anyway, so we spent an hour or so in that exhibit, and the rest of the gallery is free, so we explored it all. We sorta skipped Asian art, because it was sorta boring, but we saw a TON of 17th, 18th, and 19th century European art. Some Picassos, some Rembrandts, some other famous painters that I'm sure other people would remember but not me. We saw a couple contemporary exhibits, and a boring photography exhibit, but an incredible video installation from Latin America (http://www.ngv.vic.gov.au/resonantvisions/) and a great collection of prints by Otto Dix (http://www.ngv.vic.gov.au/war/).

This was the coolest video, the painter would paint faces and then they would evaporate while he would paint the next one and it just kept switching. It was really neat.

But, the whole of or museum trip took us FOUR and a HALF HOURS. 4.5 hours of walking around this GIANT gallery and looking at paintings, and we didn't even sit there and contemplate most of them, we just walked by and saw them. It was insane. I'll go back when some of the exhibits change and give it another good once over.

Still no job. Was told to send an application to Aesop (pro: eeee sawp) because they were hiring. They sell incredibly beautiful sprays and lotions and etc...
Smell so good.

We made pizza last night, it was yummy. Tonight is $10 steak night, although I might not go to it. We will see.

Okay, back to doing nothing with my life!

Get your high speed internet engines STARTED.

2008-07-12T09:53:00.000+10:00

This shall be a multimedia update to try and relate some aspects of Melbourne to all of you through sight rather than...reading? Whatever, you like youtube.

Last night I sat around watching Australian footy. Okay, this is a crazy sport that is basically only played down here it seems, and at first look it's like rugby but...it's not.

The idea is to score points by putting the ball between the two center uprights. If you catch a ball from a kick of a determined distance or more, you get a free kick (this is called a mark, and is what most of this video is). You can smother kicks, you can tackle, and if you're running with the ball you have to bounce it every now and then. St. Kilda won last night. Wooo home team.

The trams. This is what I spend around 2 hours a day on when I'm playing around in the city.

(oh and yes I love French but it was one of the only videos with a view of the inside of the tram, I'm not that lame.)

So Acland St. is right out my door, if you go look at that map I posted you can see it's really like a block away. So I found a video of some drunk girl doing a tour. They start out literally 1 min walk from my house, across from a porn shop.

I forgot to mention how many protests Melbourne has a while back. When Joan and I were on a tram a few weeks ago we went by the parliment building and there was an overturned car on the steps...like UP the steps. People had to carry it up there, and then flip it over. There was stuff everywhere, people, police...it was just crazy. Anyway, the next day we say security guards on strike, and Joan saw a marching band on a tram line protesting trams or something. It is crazy. Anyway, to give you an idea, here is a video of Melburnians protesting for Macedonia.

Okay so this was a lazy post, but there hasn't been much to update. I went to the Aquarium, I bought some DJ gear, and I still don't have a job.
Yeaaaauh!

I'll post when something exciting happens!

Now I'm free to sink my own damn ship

2008-07-08T17:03:00.000+10:00

So after a frigid day of staggering disappointment in the world of job searching, I came home to a big box of fish and chips. It was maybe the best meal I've eaten since being in Australia. That might have been due to how hungry I was, or how dreadful today ended up being, or maybe even just because it was hot and my room was freezing, but I never knew fried food could make me feel so happy.

I realized the other day that I have eaten fries (chips!) almost every day for the last week or so. That's gross, but delicious. I think I dropped the weight I wanted to when I moved here, became sick, and walked around all day for a week straight. Too bad I'm a little fatty wannabe and went on a binge of fries. Joan and I compared tummies, Emma judged, I won. That should be a CMJ category, skinny kids with the most abnormal poochy guts. Make it happen Lisa.

I finished the Yiddish Policeman's Union, and Gentlemen of the Road by Michael Chabon. The Adventures of Kavalier and Clay is on my floor but I decided to take a break from books about Jews and instead started reading 100 Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. Oh yeah, my pro/con for Wayne and Garth never came to fruition, so instead we will just conclude if you want to rule, get chicks, and wear black...Wayne is your man. If you like being goofy, and playing the drums, and being a lone wolf...Garth is your model human being. Get yourself some red rope licorice.

I cooked. Yeah! Mom be proud! We made Mexican for the girls, because we can do that and blow their minds for like $3. The tortillas were incredible! Home made! I was very impressed at how easy they were. I also made some Greek garbanzo bean salad with mint and garlic and scallions and such. It was super easy, but look at that! Fresh cooked food to supplement my diet of fried potatoes! Joan also showed me how to fry an egg. I don't like cooking eggs, but it looks like I will have to get the hang of it. They are the cheap food of choice so far.

Okay, as promised, here are pictures: the beach and a giant pineapple Joan and I found.

In hindsight, I don't want to be like the people I liked

2008-07-03T20:49:00.000+10:00

So I discussed with Sierra today the finer points of writing a book. Sallie suggested it, so I mentioned it to a few people, and Sierra said "why not?"

My response was obviously: My life is stupid, plus I suck at writing in proper grammar. I even spelled grammar wrong when I wrote that response to her.

We did agree on one thing, the book title would be "Fucking Marsupials"

Fucking marsupials.

Joan moved out to her apartment...yesterday. Her room mates smoke inside (yuck) and told her they wouldn't when they showed her the house (double yuck, right?).

Other than that though, her room is great. We both got space heaters today...we deemed $20 worth it. Mine smells like plastic and I might die from the fumes tonight. Don't worry, I'll sleep inside my normal cocoon of sheets and filter out that gross air.

Let's talk about words for a moment. Beyond the fact that I just had to rewrite the last sentence like 5 times, these Australians are funny.
Comforter = duvet = duvie (slang) = du-vi
Red head = ginger = ranger (slang, orangutan) = ɹeɪn-gɚ

(look at those linguistics shine, 5 years!)

Those are the two best. Now let's talk about candy (lollies as they are called here).
Anything gummy (you know, gumdrops, fruit slice things, mint leaves, etc...) is like grossly gummy and soft. Joan says it's because we use corn syrup. I say it's too chewy, my jaw clicks after 2 of them and it bothers me to eat with a gross clicking noise inside my head. Ew.
There is a flavor of candy called "Musk." Emma said it was her favorite, and when asked to describe it, she says "Ya know the smell, like cologne that's labeled 'musk'? It's like that."

I vomited right there. Joan made it 3 steps further, vomited, and then we both laughed until we vomited again. Gross.

Emma just brought some home because I didn't believe it. That anyone could eat something like that. Guess what!? Vegimite isn't the only disgusting thing in Australia! Nope not the girls either! Musk candy is like the spray from your $9 bottle of cologne from when you were 12 and you just forgot to close your mouth because you're stupid.

The parrots were up to their freaking-the-shit-out-of-me antics again today. I guess it's not just like mating week, it's like mating every Thursday afternoon. An orgy of bright green and red.
OH! Joan and I saw a pigeon fight yesterday! How crazy! It was like a miniature cockfight between animals stupider than chickens, we just had to stop walking and laugh. Pigeons don't fight to the death though, just till someone walks past them we found out.

As a pre-birthday wish, I hope you all do what Joan and I have planned for the 4th of July. Rum and coke and Jimmy Buffet in honor of my father. Thanks for everything Dad.

I got a sweet new duvie cover at Ikea today. I hope most everyone knows how happy this makes me. Stylicious. $12. From Sweden. What could be better?

I think...
Wait, MEATBALLS could make it better. Damnit, back to Ikea.

Job hunting sucks. Ya know, just so everyone knows. It sucks. Especially when you have a resume that is cool for music jobs but might as well scream "Yeah I wasted 5 years getting a degree and not working in hospitality, child care, or retail. How fucking stupid of me. Oh p.s. I can talk on the radio, cool right?"

I hope to find a small American flag for tomorrow, and to get blasted and teach people the national anthem. I should probably brush up on that myself. Maybe I'll stick to the pledge of allegiance. Or the "beans beans the magical fruit..."

Yeah, the last one. It'll be a hit. I'll record it with digeridoos.

Fucking marsupials.

(pictures to come, Joan took them all!)

Boy pick up that chin, but I always end up back where I begin.

2008-06-29T23:04:00.000+10:00

The parrots in St. Kilda are crazy. Yeah, like full on batshit crazy. Down here, we have like 3 birds it seems. Seagulls, which are dumb and stuff. Pigeons, see description for seagulls. And Parrots. They screech loudly, they're pretty, they travel in pairs, and they are EVERYWHERE. It sounded so loud the other day, just from the birds in the palm trees. But the scary thing was that you couldn't even see them, they just blended in with the trees, and made tons of noise.

My hangovers down here seem to be worse than ever. Maybe I'm old now. That magical age when hangovers determine that you don't want to drink. Let's hope not. Or maybe I've just done all the damage my liver can casually take. That'd suck too. Maybe I'm just a wuss.

I want to thank my dear old sister for telling me to eat greasy food when I was hungover. It's saved me from puking my guts out a million times.

Tessa likes to text me, I think I make her laugh because I'm such a dick. Some of you will understand.

We're doing Mexican tomorrow night for the girls. We're even making our own tortillas, because the ones in the Safeway looked like shit.

They don't have yellow cheddar here. What. The. Hell. They have cheese that they call "Tasty" Not Colby, or Jack, or Mozzarella. Tasty. So weird. It's actually white cheddar, but they call it Tasty. I don't like that one bit.

I've decided that I should have learned my lesson the first time that blue poster tack didn't work in my life, because today a poster fell on my head. Idea: never buy that stuff again, it's terrible. When my room mate tries talks me out of tacks again, I'll tell her to shut the hell up and buy some spackle. Spell check doesn't like that word, maybe I should just change it to sparkle. That'd be funnier.

Tomorrow starts the job search. Well not exactly starts, as I have been looking online relentlessly. We will see I guess.

Joan is staying in Melbourne, she found a wonderful room, I bet she'll write about it in her blog. I'm glad, because I'd miss her dearly.

Lost the auction for that midi controller. Which is fine, I will just have to search out a new one, and turn into a superstar DJ a month later than I had planned. Yeah. Rock on.

Crisis at the moment: What book do I read next, as I really would like to be literate.
Runner up: Is it better to be Wayne or Garth?

I'll post my pro/con list soon.

Every morning is the same

2008-06-27T10:53:00.000+10:00

Well here we are. I guess there are more people reading this than I thought. Hello to you.
Today is the 9th day of my Australian adventure. The internet is slow because I downloaded too much I think. Oops.

I got my room set up and unpacked and such. It's nice. I love Ikea. For around $100 I got...
2 big blue bags to hold stuff, 3 dish towels, a trashcan, 10 nice big hangers, sheets, a duvet, a blanket, a shower curtain, a closet organizer, and...chocolate bars. The last thing I need is a bedside table. I NEED one for some reason. I don't like all this crap just on the floor next to my bed.

I bid on a BCD2000, which is a midi controller for my computer. Basically something that can emulate turntables/cd players with a mixer on my computer so I don't have to re-buy all that stuff if I want to DJ. And speaking of DJ'ing, the Esplanade hotel has a bunch of shows and are always looking for DJs (so says their website) AND is right around the corner. Maybe I can give it a go once I get some equipment. That'd be nice.

I'm a nerd and posted a missed connection for a cute redhead girl that works at the Lush store in the city. Woooooah she's hot.

We went out to indian food last night, it was great, and relatively cheap. It was my housemates birthday party. It was a surprise party with about 14 people and I got to make a toast. "I've known you for 3 days, happy birthday. Thank you, and our other housemates for letting me rent the room and for letting Joan stay with us. I hope to see the rest of you again soon" because you're all girls and you're all cute.

I don't know what to do with myself. I think I will go look for a job next week. Follow up on Missing Link records...I gave them my information and they probably just trashed it. There are 2 other record stores within spitting distance of my house. One that seems to specialize in funk and soul, how cool. There are also tons of little boutiques, so I will probably apply to just be a retail bitch somewhere. It will be fine for a 6 month stay, and if it's close to my house that'd be a super added bonus!

Other new stuff...
Liquor prices are absurd...well, yeah. If you come visit, be prepared to drop some cash on duty free liquor for Joan and I. Not even kidding. A small bottle of gin...the cheapest is $25. Whaaaaat?! Anyways, wine is cheap, but I hate drinking wine all the time.

Next door they are starting construction. Hah.

My housemates are...not clean. But not terribly dirty. Just sorta comfortable being a little dirty, which I guess is better than being a clean freak. But I am bothered by it a bit. I will just have to clean stuff secretly.

I need a space heater too. None of the bedrooms in our house have heat. Well...they do, but the heating vents don't work like they do in other rooms of the house. Elsewhere it gets quite hot, in the rooms, it's coooolllllllld.

I will start writing letters today I do believe, so if you're expecting one, there should be one for you soon. It costs me $2 to send it to you though, so love and cherish it.

I've woken up every morning in the past 4 thinking consistently about Stacey.

In this room with a view
and so much of you
is so far from here

I'm deep inside myself
But I'll get out somehow

Thanks Mojave 3 and Neil Young.

I'm being eaten.

2008-06-26T22:55:00.000+10:00

By luna park!

BNT stands for Bras and Things...it's a store!

2008-06-23T22:47:00.000+10:00

Yikes! It's been a while since I updated this. I should probably not fall into that habit already!

Since last time:
Reese was actually Tessa. Who I sorta blew off because her room was way out...but she ended up being really nice. Joan got along with her real well.

Emma, Megan, and Fatima are my new housemates, and I took their room. http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&hl=en&geocode=&q=18+Fawkner+St,+St+Kilda,+VIC+3182,+Australia&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=33.160552,76.992187&ie=UTF8&ll=-37.864843,144.979062&spn=0.008063,0.018797&t=h&z=16&iwloc=addr

It's in St. Kilda which is a tourist spot turned cool. I live next to Luna Park...actually you can see the tops of these things from my doorstep at night. They light up.
http://www.danaforinash.com/2006/Melbourne/Luna%20Park%20Face.JPG

I don't know what else to put up here really. Joan might move on from Melbourne as she is having a hard time finding a place to live...but she'll come back when it's warmer. The house is nice, I will make a tour video if I can.

I'm still all jet lagged, I went to bed at 730 last night. I'm also sick.

Step 1: House (accomplished)
Step 2: Job
Step 3: Fun
Step 4: Travel
Step 5: Love

We'll see how far I get on the list.

Another day another...dead kangaroo

2008-06-20T15:21:00.000+10:00

So today was productive. It was nice. Joan and I got up early again, really early. Jet lag is just kicking both of our asses. But I texted a lot, traded in my phone for one that worked (mine broke), and hung out with Joan's first roommate interview thing.

We met Andy, he was incredibly nice and it just seemed like he wanted to be our friend. Which was nice, since we have none down here. He showed us his house, showed us the area, bought us coffee/hot chocolate, chatted with us about tons of things, and then walked us to a place where we could find more houses/rooms to rent. It was really nice of him.

Tonight I am going to meet Reese, a girl who is moving but leaving her furnished room in Brunswick to someone. Hopefully me. We will see. It's the right price, right area, but I'm afraid the room mates and I won't get along, or something. Anyways, she's really nice and I feel like I want to live with her! Too bad she is leaving.

As well I have another meeting with a girl named Dana. I can't see the house until tomorrow, but she wanted to see if her room mates and I could all meet up and chat, see if we get along. This is the email I got from her:

"I am responding to your email regarding North Fitzroy Home - Needs 1 one more dweller to be complete

(i am at work so emailing from work email). We really want a boy and I like Jens and cupcakes so you might be perfect.

My boyfriend is also a ginger ninja so you could get along famously.

The other girls are great too.

I suggest you come and see the room immediately and we can take it from there."

It makes me pretty excited that someone actually might like me, and WANT me to live with them. It's in a nice area too, the club district, and they seem like fun girls. I'm really excited about it, and if one of those two don't work out...I'm going to be sorta screwed for a bit I think. We will see.

Sushi is $2 a roll here. It is pretty good, not the best, but not the worst. It comes with the CUTEST little fish shaped soy sauce droppers. Joan is sending one back.

Anyways, I miss some people but mainly glad I moved on. It's hard not having those people in my life but I think...well...I should see them again soon. I was upset when I got here a bit, but am pretty excited now. I just want to get a place for a month...then I will be able to relax a bit and find a place to work. I asked this super rad record shop in the CBD if they needed help and they told me to leave my name and number and they'd let me know. I hope it works out...because they were fucking killer. Bela Karoli, Slim Cessna, and everything that twist and shout has minus all the shit that twist and shout has. It was rad. They even had the Hyped to Death comps, I've only ever seen those in Othermusic. Fuck yeah.

Anyways. The Lucksmiths are playing soon, in a week, and I'm sure there are a few other bands playing. I'm excited to see them. Hopefully I have a place to live! :)

Okay, this is too much for one day, I'm going to get back to drinking wine and making myself look pretty for these girls.
:D

First 24hrs

2008-06-19T07:58:00.000+10:00

Okay, still jet lagged. Joan and I woke up ridiculously early, and went to bed ridiculously early, but everything seems to be chugging along. It's a little bit overwhealming, and I hate that. I just feel like there is so much pressure on me to succeed and make sure everything appens for me, and I don't even know where to begin.

Things I do know.

I got here at 9:30 in the morning yesterday, it was mine and Joan's goal to stay up for 10 hours, and not go to go to sleep before that. Well Joan made it 7 or so, I made it 12 or so. The hostel is really nice, we have bunk beds, hah! They started playing, at 8am this morning, Ring of Fire. Yesterday they were playing something equally as strange for a hip little hostel in Melbourne.

It's cold. Like not bitter winter cold, but it's like 55-60, and it's the heart of fall. Trees have no leaves, and we are walking around in cardigans and sweaters. It's sorta weird, not because it's cold. But because it's fall in June. That just blows my mind.

The city is the hippest place I've ever been. Not even joking. The skyscrapers are art deco, the big squares are crazy looking, everything is just...hip. All the kids wear uniforms to school, but I'm guessing on the weekends they are just littering the town. The tram system seems really easy and reliable. Not too expensive, $140 for a month. I got a phone, which is a piece of shit, and if you saw me with it you'd probably laugh your ass off because of how stupid I am with it. But it was cheap, and should work fine for a year.

I have internet that I'm stealing, and Joan and I are about to ride into the city to grab free internet from a cafe or something, because she doesn't have it at the hostel. Stealing internet to find internet to steal. Hah.

I don't know what else to post really. I'm excited, but worried. I can't wait to make friends. I can't wait to have my own place. I can't wait to just sit around in Melbourne and know that it's my life now, rather than any other place I've been. This is home I guess.

Don't expect many pictures on this blog, I didn't bring my camera so any of the pictures will be from my webcam in my computer. We will see though.

Okay, we're heading into town. <3